LOST
by InsanelyDemented
Summary: Everything starts out as it should but something horrible happens leaving Harry broken and lost.... WARNING: Rape is in this story as well as abuse. Do not read if you haven't read HBP! or any of the others for that matter as there are spoilers!
1. Chapter 1

disclaimer:I DON'T own anything that you recognize. Please don't sue.

author's notes:would appreciate anykinds of reviews thank you and enjoy!

CHAPTER 1

Prologue

BEEP BEEP BEE.. A disgruntled teen quickly reached over and turned off the alarm before it could awaken his relatives. he stretched before dragging himself out of bed and over to his wardrobe while running a hand through his mass of messy black hair and putting his round rimmed glasses on. He grabbed some of his cousin's old clothes that hung off him and put them on. He looked at himself in the mirror& found it hard to believe that this slightly muscular and slightly tan boy well young man was Harry Potter. He chuckled at the thought of his best friends faces upon seeing him.

Harry checked his watch and saw that it was 8 in the morning realizing he only had till 10 which is when he had to be at the burrow he quickly grabbed his already packed trunk and Hedwig's empty cage (she was at the Weasley's already) and took one last look at his room knowing that he'd never see it again and not wanting to leave anything behind before he exited and descended the stairs not bothering to try to keep the noise down. He dropped his trunk in the hall with a bang

"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU BOY?" his uncle yelled from the kitchen.

"Oh nothing I'm just going to grab a bite to eat then leave" he said walking to the fridge not even glancing at his purple faced uncle or anyone for that manner. He grabbed the milk and cereal and made himself some breakfast. He then walked over to the table with a bowl of cereal in one hand and a glass of OJ in the other. Half way through he felt stares on him he looked up to see his 'family' glaring at him. He shook it of and quickly finished placed his dishes in the sink and stood in front of his aunt uncle and cousin.

"Ok I'm going to leave now you won't be hearing from me. Don't bother to write cause I won't answer and I hope I'll never have to see you again ..."he paused to allow his words to sink in "so long" he turned around and left with his belongings without a second glance.

Once he got to the end of the drive way he put up his wand arm wand in hand and saw the knight bus land right in front of him. Harry grabbed his trunk and owls cage and got on the purple triple decker bus.

"Where yeh 'eaded Mr. Potter" asked the conductor

"The leaky cauldron" Harry answered

"That'll be 11sickles and 1 knut"

Harry paid him and sat down in the closest chair just as the bus shot off to the Leakey cauldron. Before long they were there.

"Do you think that you could shrink these for me" Harry asked indicating his belongings the conductor nodded and shrunk them to the size of a match box. He left the bus and headed to the nearest muggle clothes store. It was called the 'Phat Shack' he entered

"Well good morning young sir can I help you" a man around the age of 25 asked him. The man was black& had a pair of baggy pants and a big t-shirt on along with a bandanna and a few piercings. Harry nodded. The store clerk smiled and motioned for Harry to follow him through the numerous racks of clothes...

About an hour and a half later Harry exited the store with 2 bags of clothes and no longer wearing Dudley's old rags but a pair of baggy jeans held up with a black leather belt. A black muscle t-shirt and a baggy black hoody that said slipknot in jagged letters. he also had gotten a pair f black 'skater shoes ' and a pair of black and red converse satisfied with his purchases he put his hood up and entered the leaky cauldron . He went strait to the fire place grabbed some floo powder and said 'the burrow' nice and clearly. He closed his eyes tight and held his bags firmly in his hands. He landed roughly on the wooden floor of the Weasly's home he smelled food and heard the clatter of pot and pans and many loud voices. Harry smiled as he stood up dusted himself off and walked into the loud kitchen. The scene he saw before him was one he would cherish for years to come.

Mrs.Weasly was bringing dishes piled with food over to the table around which the rest of the family was happily chatting (with the exception of Percy and Charlie. and the addition of Hermione granger one of his best friends.) Bill Weasly was talking with his fiancé Fleur Delacour. Fred, George and Mr.Weasley were talking about the ministry. His best friends were in another argument. And Ginny, his ex, was sitting across from them trying to suppress her giggles. Ginny looked beautiful even more so then the mere week or two give or take a few days previously. The sunlight coming through the window behind her gave her an illuminating glow. Her hair shined gorgeously as she flipped it away from her face. All in all she took his breath away. Time seemed to freeze. He could only hear the rapid beating of his heart in his ears. He took in every detail of her smiling and laughing face. ...'stop it just stop' he scolded himself tearing his away from Ginny.

"Harry dear you're early!" said an ecstatic Molly Weasley giving Harry a suffocating hug. Harry hugged her back all the while fighting the tears away. And gluing a smile to his face. The smile though didn't reach his eyes. No one though notice it. No one that is except for one girl in particular... Once Harry was released from the many hugs and handshakes the 11 of them sat down for breakfast Harry sat down next to Ron across from Ginny and Hermione. He placed his bags under his chair.

"Harry mate what did ya do to your self?" Ron asked incredulously

"Huh?" he asked even though he thought he knew what he meant, he wasn't sure.

"Look at your self Harry. It looks like you worked out or something and what are you wearing?" Hermione said Harry chuckled

"Well I used some of Dudley's workout things for most of the day outside so as to get away from the glares of the Dursleys." he said simply. upon seeing the looks on Ron Hermione and Ginny's faces he said "look I'm fine ill be alright it gave me a lot of time to sort things out" they nodded understanding he then grabbed some of the food that was covering the table and loaded up his plate wanting to escape their worried looks and further conversation. He found himself not liking to talk much anymore and just observe things.

He found out that Bill and Fleurs wedding was in two weeks on the 24th of July. Meaning that it was exactly 14 days away. Which meant that he had to wait at least 14 days before going after any of the horcruxes. He was told that he would be staying in Fred and George's room 'cause they were only there to finish cleaning it out.

Once he finished eating (which was before anyone else because he had already had breakfast before) he asked Mrs. Weasley to enlarge his trunk and Hedwig's cage and he headed to Fred and Georges old room. He put his trunk at the end of one of the beds along with the bags. And the cage on the dresser. He then stretched out on the bed he used the last time. He couldn't help thinking that last summer when ha had gone to the burrow that Dumbledore had been the one to take him from the hell of the Dursleys. He even sort of took him away from them by saying that after that summer Harry wouldn't have to return the only other person that had given him that happiness had been Sirius

'heh how ironic their both dead and died not that long after they had said that.' he thought saddly 'and they both died because of Snape...' he was brought from his thought by a knock at his door.

"Come in" he told the knocker. Figuring it to be Ron and Hermione. He was right. In walked his two best friends. He sat up sensing that they wanted to talk. And yet again he was right.

"Harry are you sure that your okay you seem a bit er far away" Hermione said sitting on the edge of his bed and Ron sitting on the other bed.

"As I said before I'm fine or as fine as I can be under the circumstances. and anyway I was thinking that the day after the wedding that we go after the horcruxs or I am anyway if you guys have changed you minds ill understand" he said not looking either of them in the eye but instead studying his hands.

"Harry... Harry look at me we are not going to let you go through all of this alone. And we can't leave that soon cause you wont be able to do magic yet." Hermione told him with a smile. A thought occurred to him

"but Hermione your not going to be able to do magic yet either." to his surprise she laughed

"Harry doesn't worry professor McGonagall said that as a reward for such good grades that I'll be able to use them 2 months early. So on July 18 ill be allowed to use my magic without getting in trouble" Harry gasped at Hermione's words

"That's not fair! You'll be able to before me!" his friend s just continued to laugh. He soon gave in. and laughed with them

The days flew by. And before they knew it was time for the wedding. The wedding was beautiful Mrs. Weasley was in tears along with a lot of other people. including Hermione, Ron sat with his arm around her through most of it fleur looked stunning bill looked handsome even with his scars from that fateful night in June Ginny was with Gabrielle in form fitting pale gold knee length dresses. They were wearing gold colored high heels with wrap around straps up to their mid shin. Her red hair was wavy and two pieces from the sides of her face were pulled back away from her face and held with a gold clip to match. She looked gorgeous.

Once Fleur and Bill said their 'I do's' everyone went the room across the hall which was where the reception was being held. Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Fred, and George got a round table together. Fred was next to George and Ron. Hermione was on Ron's other side .Ginny was between Hermione and Harry who was on George's other side.

Half way through the dinner Ron and Hermione started arguing bout something pointless. George leaned into Harry.

"They ought to hurry up and get married already eh?" George whispered with a chuckle Fred having leaned into listen as well as Ginny all started to crack up. Ron and Hermione gave them odd looks before going back to their food Harry also returned to his food. The room was filled with chatter.

As with any wedding, the bride and groom had the first dance. And just as Harry told the others he wasn't going to dance a little girl with little golden curls tied back in a half ponytail with a little pink butterfly clip matching her pink dress. She couldn't have been more than 5 years old. He smiled at her. She returned it

"hello Mr. Harry Potter, sir." she greeted happily" my name is Mariah."

"Hi Mariah. What can I do 4 you?" he asked admiring her grey eyes. And smiling at her.

"Well... I was wondering if you would dance with me?" she asked giving him the puppy eyes. He chuckled as he got up and grabbed her expectant hand. Harry turned back to the people at his table that were laughing presumably at him.

"I'll be back in a bit guys" he said before heading out to the dance floor. Turned out that Mariah didn't really know how to dance, so he let her stand on his feet. He was a mere 2 feet from his seat after the song had ended, when another little girl asked for a dance. Being a nice guy he said yes. Bout a half hour later he waddled back to his seat beside Ginny and Ron. (George and Fred were dancing with a couple of Fleur's cousins) Hermione was on Ron's other side. When he sat down everyone laughed.

"What?" he snapped

"You were just so cute!" Ron said as if he were talking to a 5 year old. Understanding what they were laughing at Harry joined in. before they even knew it was the last song before they had to leave. Ron stood up .walked over to Hermione

"Hermione would you dance with me?" he asked shyly she merely smiled and nodded. It was just Ginny and Harry.

"Harry would you dance with me?" Ginny said suddenly

"Errr ok." He answered. In truth he had wanted to dance with her but didn't want her to ask for more details about why they had ended it and ask to start out fresh. on the dance floor Ginny giggled at his cluelessness on how to dance with a girl over 3 ft. as she grabbed his left hand in her right put his right on her waist and finally her left on his shoulder. Remembering how it went they started to dance talking bout random things all the while. He felt so at ease with her. The music to his disappointment stopped she leaned in as if to kiss him but instead whispered...

"I found these and thought you might like 'em" she said in a voice so low only he could hear as he felt her slip something in his pants pocket before kissing him on the cheek and walking away towards Charlie and his girlfriend.

Bill and fleur walked into the center of the dance floor. Bill had a broom in 1 hand and Fleurs hand in the other. Everyone started clapping (the mothers and a few other females began to cry) the happily married couple got onto the broom and waved good bye one last time before flying through the open skylight. Everyone slowly started apparating home. Hermione and the older Weasly's with the exception of Mr. & Mrs. Weasly who said a few cleaning spells and charms Harry prepared himself to apparate back to the burrow(having passed his test a few days ago) when a hand grabbed his arm . He jumped and turned towards the culprit.

"WHAT THE HELL..."he started but seeing who it was took a deep calming breath "sorry Gin you startled me what is it?"

"Well mum and dad are apparating together because mum's a wreck. Ron and Hermione are arguing about a cleaning charm and no one else is going to the burrow sooooo... I was hoping you'd apparate with me since I don't know how and not allowed to?" Ginny asked curiously he nodded grudgingly.

"Ok hold onto me..."he instructed she grabbed onto his waist he concentrated on where he wanted to go rather than the girl holding onto him. Traveling felt very well strange not only did he feel like he was going through a rubber tube but Ginny was pushed more into him in a slightly comfortable way considering the circumstances. They finally landed in the kitchen of the Weasley home. Ginny started to fall but his seeker reflexes caught her. His emerald eyes met her sapphire ones. Harry didn't know how long they stayed like that. It was as if he was hypnotized.

A loud crack was heard and they jumped apart. Harry ascended the stairs to his room b4 there could be a really awkward moment he instinctively ran a hand through his hair and put it into his pants pocket. He felt some thick pieces of parchment in there already. Remembering that Ginny had slipped something in there earlier he pulled them out. He was shocked at what he saw. There was a few wizard pictures.1 was of him and Ginny while they were still together. He had his hands on her waist keeping her close to him and she had her hands on his chest. They kept looking at the camera and each other smiling the whole time. Picture Harry and Ginny were standing in front of the lake and his favorite beach tree at sunset. They were still in their Hogwarts uniform.

He continued up the stairs as he flipped to the second (last) picture, it was a picture of himself, Ron and Hermione in the same spot as the previous picture. The three of them were smiling happily and waving at the camera. He quickly placed them back in his pocket since he was seconds from his bedroom door. As he turned the knob he whispered "if only I could go back to that and fix everything." he pushed the door open and with a murmur and a flash of light Harry Potter knew no more.


	2. Broken

disclaimer: I do NOT own Harry Potter or anything here that you recognize. J.K.Rowling does.

**WARNING:This chapter contains abuse, Rape and other nasty things. Has detail of everything do not read if you don't want to know about some major trauma. **

CHAPTER 2

Broken

Harry awoke with an excruciating pain in his scar. He yelled out in pain it felt just like when Voldemort had possessed him in the ministry but it was worse now about twice as bad. He pressed his hands on his forehead trying to stop the pain. He faintly heard a few cracks in the distance. The pain grew still worse and he started screaming. Then just as if someone flipped a switch turning off a light the pain stopped Harry stopped screaming. He felt something wet on his hands. But instead of seeing the glossy wetness of sweat he saw the thick redness of blood he gave into the dark and became unconscious once more.

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When he awoke he was pain free. He stretched and got up to locate his glasses. He found them in a corner of the empty room. He quickly put them on wanting to figure out where he was. Harry didn't have to think hard to figure out that he was in a kind of dudgeon. The entire room was grey stone. There were shackles and chains on one wall the room was about the size of Fred and George's but was lacking furniture. There was a door to his left and a small window with bars to his right. Under which he found more chains and shackles.

Harry started to pace as he ran a hand through his hair well tried to cause it was all greasy and slightly matted.

"Uuugh disgusting" he whispered to himself. He heard a click presumably of the opening the closing of a door Harry whipped around to face his captor.

"So I see that you have finally woken up" Voldemort said casually conjuring a chair and sitting in it. Then conjuring one for Harry but it had chains around the arms and legs unlike Voldemorts."Sit Harry" he ordered. Harry however did not move "NOW" he flicked his wand and Harry felt hands pushing him into the chair. The chains sprung to life and bound him a little too tight for comfort "there now that wasn't too hard now was it"

"What do you want?" Harry asked acidly.

"well I guess we could just get to the point what I want is you to tell me what the prophesy said" Harry opened his mouth to say something "no I know that Dumbledore heard the prophesy and he most likely told you so that you would know why you had no parents and what not." he said in a bored voice as if they were talking about the weather that struck a nerve but Harry kept his temper down knowing that it wouldn't do any good

"Why is my scar not hurting?" Harry asked randomly trying to figure out what to say about the prophesy. Upon noticing the irritated look in his eyes though he explained "well whenever I get near you it hurts and your right in front of me and it doesn't why is that?" Voldemort sighed

"I put a dark numbing charm on it so that it wouldn't start bleeding like it did yesterday when you first woke up. Back onto subject what did the prophesy say?" he said angrily looking Harry strait in the eye. Harry quickly looked away and cleared his mind.

"I don't know he was going to tell me when he felt the time was right."

"You know" Voldemort began as he got up from his chair." I was going to just kill you quickly figuring I had tortured you plenty by taking away you family and your freedom. But since you don't want to help me then I'm not going to be nice to you I know a lot of my servants would love some alone time with you" as he said that no less than 10 death eaters walked in they made a circle around their master and Harry.

He knew that he would suffer the cruciatus curse a few cutting curses and maybe a few nasty potions and then they would kill him and dump his body somewhere that there was a lot of people. He did not how ever think that they would do it for 6 days strait. Harry woke up, on the cold stone floor that was stained with his own blood, with a swift kick to the face from Bellatrix estrange

" happy birthday Harry" Bellatrix said in a sickly sweet voice Harry sat up and put his glasses on he looked around and saw that nearly all of voldemorts inner circle was there which was highly odd unless there was a particularly evil plan afoot." you have a big day ahead of you." she said with a bone chilling giggle. As she flicked her wand at the chains attached to the wall behind him. he felt the chains attach around his wrists and ankles and hoist him a few inches above the ground before tightening so that his back was flat against the wall and the chains were started to cut into his wrists the more he fought against his bonds. The Death Eaters formed a semicircle around Harry and Voldemort who was walking up closer to him. Harry's scar started to burn he screwed up his eyes as the pain grew. It stopped once it got to the point it had been in his 4th year in the graveyard. He pushed the pain from his thoughts enough to concentrate on what his captors were going to do.

"Now you are 17 if I am not mistaken is that right" Voldemort said. Harry nodded trying to figure out where he was going. "Well I've come up with a new torture session but I am giving you one last chance to tell me the prophesy and I will either give you a chance to run or I will kill you quickly. If you stick with 'I don't know' then I'll go through with many torture sessions. It's your choice."

'Now that's a choice! die slowly or die quickly' Harry thought sarcastically his choice was already made up this way he'd at least have a chance to be found 'plus I can handle all of the crucios and cutting spell and options he throws at me their bound o find me within the month' he told himself in his mind but in truth he wasn't sure. "I don't know about what the prophesy said Dumbledore didn't want to put much more on me at the time" he said with a strait face

"You know what we do with people to break them?" Voldemort asked "to get the information we want?" Harry shook his head no all the while getting a very bad feeling in his empty stomach. Having heard of some grotesque stories of before Voldemort fell the first time. "We first break them on the outside then on the inside then lastly mentally."

Harry gulped Voldemort flicked his wand and Harry felt air all over himself he looked down and saw he was no longer in any clothing at all .Harry blushed he didn't like being chained to the wall unable to cover himself. Unfortunately the uneasiness didn't end there with another flick of his wand Voldemort was bare as well. Then it hit him. Harry started to struggle against his chains to get away or to wake himself up. Either was quite nice.

Voldemort laughed coldly at Harry's reaction and flicked his wand again Harry felt the bonds let go. But rather than placing him on the floor Voldemort just flipped him so that his chest was against the wall rather than his back. The chains constricted themselves around Harry's wrist's and ankles again he started breathing heavily while whispering to himself "its going to be ok he's not going to do what your thinking he cant he won't" over and over again. He heard laughter behind him everyone was clearly listening to his conversation with himself.

Harry shuddered as he felt someone running a cold finger down his spine. And he yelled out in agony as his scar seared with even more. He figured it to be Voldemort be hind him, voldemort was the one pressing an erection on the inside of his thighs causing more pain from his scar... Harry kept whispering "this isn't happening your having a nightmare Voldemort's placing it in you mind to weaken you your going to wake up soon to Mrs.Weasleys frightened cries of 'its going to be ok" Voldemort laughed and whispered just loud enough for Harry to hear

"This Harry is real. And you will never see or hear the Weasleys again... unless I decide to torture one to hurt you." he added as an after thought.

"Please don't..." was all that harry could manage to say

"Don't worry Harry... It won't even hurt... I promise." He hissed in a bone chilling tone just before he plunged his entire erection into him. Harry screamed out in agony as Voldemort continued to pump into him more aggressively, each time he pulled out all the way and pushed himself back in completely so as to get more yells and screams from his victim. After what felt like an eternity to Harry Voldemort pushed himself in as far as possible and cummed inside of him. He then removed himself from Harry and walked away from the limp boy attached to the wall. Seconds later Harry felt a second plunge their hard member into him. Harry yelled as they started pumping him harder and faster and finally let the warm liquid free inside of him. Soon a third walked over and plunged themselves into him as if he were the common whore. A fourth person. Fifth. Sixth. Seventh. Eighth. Ninth. Tenth. He made it up to 17 before he, barely feeling a man pushing his hard member deeper and deeper inside of him. Heard "happy birthday pet" said in between bone chilling moans from the creature behind him, lost consciousness.

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Harry awoke and looked around. No one was there and he wasn't chained anymore. He grabbed his glasses and scuttled his sore and abused body into the closest corner. He rolled himself into the fetal position as memories flooded through him. "Harry potter must have been a dream cause that wouldn't happen to Harry he'd fight them off. Harry's not weak. I am weak no Harry potter is gone gone forever..."he whispered to himself but was cut off by someone entering the room. He pressed himself even farther into the corner

"Hello pet." said the cold cruel voice of Voldemort.

"No... no... no... please no more p...p...please d...don't. I hurt I sorry just no" he whimpered all the while wondering 'pet ...pet ...pet means that there must be a master I am pet who is master?'

"You will call me master. You are mine now" Voldemort said and laughed at the state the supposed hero was in. 'pet' looked up as the door opened again. In walked one of 'masters' friends."Ahh Bella" master said as said female started to laugh.

"What wrong with him?" Bella asked upon hearing his whimpering cries

"It appears that the emotional and physical strain became too much and so he shut out who he was. It seems that Harry potter has locked himself inside his own mind and thrown away the key." their laughter rang throughout the room causing the now pet to shrink farther into the corner and whisperer more fervently to himself.

Pet soon got used to a schedule. Everyday his master would come in every morning with a little bit of food. Then when he finished masters friends would come in and cast crucios and maybe some slashing charms, and bone breaking ones. They'd leave for lunch then return sometimes with whips and knives. They'd use what ever they brought down sometimes pore poisons and other such concoctions and broke some more bones. But he preferred all that to what happened when the sun went down. When the sky went black the men would rape him while some of the women cast different spells on him namely crucio. he didn't know how long he had been there he had lost count soon after 67.today though pet was really worried cause his master had told his friends that they needed to take it easy because pet had a long night ahead of him. So masters friends just cut him whipped him, and stuffed more painful potions down his throat. True to his word master arrived for him as soon as the sun went down. He flicked his wand and there was a leash and choker chain collar around his neck

"Come" was all his master said before turning around to the door. Pet quickly followed. They arrived in a large room. It had black furniture and fire place which had a crackling fire burning within it. There was a large king-size bed with all black sheets and blankets and mirrors on three sides master threw him on to the bed and then climbed in himself. He then conjured another mirror on the fourth side of the bed. Pet curled up in the fetal position in the corner and stared at his master with fear in his eyes

"Pet you and I are going to celebrate because you were declared dead this morning." he said with an evil smirk pet gasped. Master pulled off their clothes and tied pet spread eagled the bed with a pillow under his chin so he had no choice but to look in the mirrors. He saw a pale boy white as a ghost. With elbow length greasy and matted black hair he looked to be just skin and bone literally he had dozens of scabs, bruises, and cuts all over his body. His bright green eyes looked full of fear and pain. Pet realized that the boy in the mirror was him he looked at the bed and saw two pieces of parchment that had fallen out of his pocket and landed right next to his right hand. He just barely managed to grab 1 it was a picture of him and a red headed girl. Just looking at her made his stomach flip flop and tears to come to his eyes as he started to remember. He had dated her she had an older brother that was his friend he was dancing with her. She was in a pale gold dress looking stunning. Pet squeezed his eyes shut. 'Master' sat beside him on pets left. Pet never saw the knife nor felt it as it began carving into him because he was looking at the second picture. He saw 3 people a red headed boy and a bushy brown haired girl. A voice deep within his mind was yelling at him over the top of his masters words. And memories. There was a severe pain in his back and chest. His master managed a few more words and to put salt on his back and chest before pet screamed but not from the second pain and heard the mirrors shatter and a loud thud. His binds were broken along with all of the mirrors. Voldemort was in a heap against the wall across the room.

(Having remembered his name) Harry didn't know what too do at first but a voice in his head told him what he should to do. Harry grabbed his clothes and found his wand on the coffee table, and put the pictures and in his pocket. Harry ran from the room from the house. Where he was going he wasn't sure but apparently the voice in his head did. How far he had run he didn't know. It seemed that he was running for an eternity before he saw the door. He heard many footsteps behind him but he ignored them all as he kept running ignoring the million stitches in his side the extreme pain in his chest that got worse with every breath. He ran through the door and outside. He paused for a second looking around doing exactly what the voice said. Suddenly he felt as if he was being pushed through a very tight rubber tire.

Then he was on the muddy ground lying on his back as rain pounded the earth and him. It stung his many cuts and washed away the blood. "Get up" said the voice. He didn't want to. What was the point he wanted to lay there until he bled to death but something within him took over his achy and pain filled body. He stood up and began to run to the huge metal gates he turned sideways and slid in between two of the poles making up the gate.

Rain poured from the sky washing away more and more of his blood and seeping into his fresh cuts and sort of activating the salt making it burn worse as he ran all the way up to two great oak doors he pushed one open enough for him to squeeze through. he suddenly felt weak and fell to the floor he coughed several times and saw blood come up he knew he was slowly dieing he heard a lot of noise coming from a second set of large oak doors. He pushed himself up feeling all of his pain and found he was unable to ignore it. He went over to the second pair of large doors and again he pushed it open enough to squeeze through. He slowly staggered up to the front table nearly falling many times. He limped up to the stern looking woman with square spectacles. The giant room was silent all except for his shaky breaths and dragged footsteps and the drip of water and blood dripping from him. He felt hundreds of stares on him. Once he made it to the table where all of the stunned adults were. No one realized that a third liquid was falling from his eyes. He said in a very raspy voice. "I'm a… a… alive n… not d… dead." He swayed for a second before collapsing in a small puddle of his own blood.


	3. After He Fell

disclaimer:do NOT own Harry Potter. He and anyone/thing you recognize here is J.K Rowling's.

Author's notes: Thischapter is basically what happens in the hall as Harry walks through it and what happens after he collapses. hope you like and Review!.. Please?

CHAP 3

After he fell

There was a stunned silence as the boy? Limped up to the teachers table. No one recognized him he looked as if he was caked with dirt. His knarled black hair was waist length, greassy, and held clumps of dirt like he hadn't washed it for months. He looked similar to the walking dead his face was pale and sported many scratches and scars, his glasses were broken his eyes and cheeks were sunken in. As he walked past the Gryffindor table a red headed girl named Ginny saw his empty green eyes behind his broken round rimmed glasses. She instinctively looked at his forehead and saw a legendary lightning bolt scar. Tears formed in her sapphire eyes and fell silently down her face when realization hit. She looked down to wipe them away and saw bloody footprints that had been left behind the boy.

"Harry, oh god!" she whispered horror struck

Hermione granger noticing the horror struck tearstained look on her face asked her what was wrong.

"HARRY!"Ginny screamed as she saw the boy fall to the floor in a puddle of his own blood she ran to his limp body. Ron and Hermione close behind. She knelt down and searched for a pulse in his swollen wrist she looked at the surrounding crowd and saw McGonagall, Pomfrey, and Hagrid coming her way. "He's got a pulse it its v... v... very f... faint but he... he's alive." she told the three adults

"Everyone will go to their dormitories immediately. The rest of dinner will be sent to your common rooms." she told the surrounding students. She turned to the teachers, nurse, and the three Gryffingor's remaining. "Hagrid, Poppy I need you to go to the hospital wing with Harry stop the bleeding and wait for me to arrive. Mr. Weasley and Miss' Granger and Weasley I want you to go to your common room..."

"we're going with Harry!" they said firmly together before following Hagrid and Pomfrey to the hospital wing McGonagall went to write a letter to the Weasley's as they had asked to be notified plus to tell them that their youngest children would be waiting for them in St. Mungo's. Before rushing to the hospital wing.

The curtains were drawn around one of the beds near the end. Around it were two sobbing girls, and two weeping adults. Ron had tears silently running down his face. She walked quickly over to madam pomfrey "What is wrong with him?" she asked

"He has m... m... multiple cuts and br...bruises. Some b... bro... bro... broken bones I think not including obvious dehydration and malnourishment he needs to go to St.Mungos for better analysis professor." she stuttered through sobs.

McGonagall grabbed an empty vial and muttered "portus" before tuning to the children "Miss Granger, Mr. & Miss Weasly, Mrs. & Mr. Weasley have been notified that you are going to be meeting them at St.Mungos so touch the portkey... Hagrid can you bring Harry? you'll be going to of course..." he nodded and tried to calm his racking sobs as he retrieved Harry and cradled him in one arm while the other touched the portkey.

"3...2...1"and with a familiar pull behind their navels the soon landed in the waiting room of the wizarding hospital they quickly went to the front of the line and show the irate healer behind the desk Harry's limp form. The healers went big and she called over five of he colleagues who took Harry to the lift.

"he's being taken to the 6th floor its a closed ward for special cases ill take you" she said and turned to a second lift she motioned for them to enter and told them to press the 6 button as she returned to her desk.

When they reached the right floor they went and sat down in the waiting room.

"Professor did you write Lupin and Tonks as well?" Hermione asked the headmistress nodded. They were soon joined by Mr. and Mrs. Weasly, Remus Lupin and Tonks after filling them in everyone just sat there in a stunned silence. Lupin had his head in his shaky hands Hagrid was sobbing into a handkerchief, Mrs. Weasley was sobbing into her husbands shoulder the rest of them had tears silently falling from their eyes or were just stunned at Harry's being found after so long. everyone was worried beyond belief they had been waiting for a little over 4 months for some kind of sign as to where he was and if he was ok. The day after they're told that the ministry is giving up that it's impossible for him to be alive. they had just set a date for a funeral to put a headstone next to his parents and Sirius and now they know he's alive but what hell did Voldemort put him through and if he was able to just run away then why didn't he do it earlier could it possibly be a Death Eater?...

about an hour later their tear filled silence was broken by the opening and closing of a door down at the end of the hall and to the right soon after that they saw a short sickly pale woman with long golden blond hair tied back in a ponytail. She had on the healer uniform with white pumps and a sad expression on her face as she walked through the double doors separating the waiting room from the ward itself.

"Are you all here for Mr. Potter?" she asked in a small voice. They all nodded. She continued" I am Cecilia DuPont Mr. Potter's personal healer. He is in a highly critical state. At the moment he is in a coma. With multiple injuries"

"Will he wake up?" asked Hermione in a shaky voice

"he may and may not we (the other healers an I) are not quite sure because it appears he might have sustained a severe amount of mental trauma"

"What were his injuries?" asked Lupin in an emotionless voice. Cecilia looked worriedly at Ron Hermione and Ginny. McGonagall informed her that they were his best friends and deserved to know.

"He has whip and knife marks all over his body. Along with some magical cuts. He has endured the cruciatus curse multiple times for extended periods as well as short. Mr. Potter had multiple broken bones his legs and arms seemed to have been broken and healed numerous times. So if he does wake up he may have trouble walking and possibly writing or using a wand." she paused to let the info sink in to the shocked people listening intently to her every word." He... he was de... de... defiled re... re... repeatedly by no less than 10 men."

"Defiled? Does... does that m... m... mean tha... that he wa... was ..." Ron wasn't able to say it. It was nauseating but he didn't need to Cecilia knew what word he was thinking of and finished his question with a sad nod

"Yes he was raped." her words hung in the air. Mrs. Weasly sobbed noisily in to her husband's chest who was also crying. Remus had tears falling silently from his eyes. Hagrid was sobbing into his handkerchief. The rest of them were either sobbing into their hands or one another's shoulders. Ginny however wasn't she was indeed crying but she was running down the hall Cecilia had come Lupin and the healer herself tight on her tail. She pulled open the door at the end of the hall on the right the only door that had a curtain over the little window in the door

Ginny stopped in the doorway shocked at how pale and thin he was. His hair was knotted and went down to approximately his mid back. His bangs covered half of his scar which was scabbed over as if it had been cut. She felt her world spinning uncontrollably as she ran to his bedside. the surreal feeling she had been in for so long abruptly breaking allowing the realization that this is the real world that this was reality to wash over her like a tidal wave increasing the flow of tears falling from her eyes. She fell to her knees at his bedside unable to hold in the racking sobs any longer and allowing them to flow through her entire body and fill the all white room with sorrow.

Lupin walked up behind the shaking heap that was now Ginny purposely avoiding looking at Harry. He bent down and collected the 16 year old in his arms

Hasn't h...he h...ha... had a b... bad enough l... life already?" Ginny asked through her tears. Nearly bringing Lupin to tears himself.

"I don't know I just don't know." he said sadly. He held her until she was able to control herself. They then went out into the waiting room Lupin took a look at Harry before closing the door, but had to quickly look away. It hurt him to see Harry in that terrible state.

"...he may act differently than he did before he ...err left." Cecilia was informing the group. Lupin and Ginny took the seats they had left 10 minutes before. "And most of all so you know and are not too alarmed, he may not remember you..."before she could continue a distraught Mrs.Weasley interjected

"How could he not remember us? We're the only family he has."

"Mrs.Weasley it's not a matter of how much he loves us but how he tried to lessen the pain that he was going through. the world put its problems on him so when he was... was... was being hurt he probably pushed his memories away to hide them from V...Voldemort so he couldn't capture one of us and do the same to whom ever. But he might have also pushed them away because it hurt him to think of what we would think of him when and if we found out." Hermione answered quickly in a quiet voice as though she thought to say it too loud would make it true.

"Yes that is right."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

those who had work left soon after that as the rest of them got chairs and got comfortable at Harry's bed side, watching delivery witches go in and out with get well gifts, sweets, and cards. The twins came in with the birthday present Harry had never got a chance to open and Harry's belongings.

" dad told us plus Harry's being found was the front page so we thought you'd all be by his side." they said at Lupins and their mothers confused looks. "How long he been like this?" Fred asked worriedly.

"4 hours" Ron said "they don't know when he'll wake up or if he even will" little did they know that they would know for sure in just 3 hours at mid night...


	4. Betrayal Realized

disclaimer:I still do NOT own harry potter or anything you recognize...

author's notes: Please do send me some reviews... good bad or whatever I do not care. thank you and enjoy!

CHAPTER 4

He opened his eyes but was over come with the brightness. He yelped in pain and put his hands over his eyes.

"Go get Cecelia, tell her he's awake at last" said a female voice he felt someone touch his arm. He yelped again and jumped off the bed. He quickly went over to the corner and brought his bony knees to his chest and started rocking back and forth his eyes were tightly shut as he continued to whimper. The nurse came in and ordered everyone out until she had calmed him down. She cautiously walked to his small frame. His green orbs were staring past her at the red headed girl and boy and a girl with bushy brown hair. As well as a shabby man with mouse brown hair with his arm around a pale woman with vivid pink hair.

when the healer got an arms length away he went into hysterics everything started to float around the room he didn't know what was happening but it was scaring him so he continued to scream, he stuck his hands in the mass of hair and closed his eyes tight. He drove his nails deeper into his scalp as images. Entered his aching head...

Knives sticking out of his chest and arms...a cold damp stone wall against his front making scratches on him as someone rammed into...whispers of whore and slut in his ear...

"no no no not real not real." he realized that he was laying in the fetal position and shaking uncontrollably on a white tile floor that was stained with blood he brought his shaking hand to his fore head and winced at the contact. He had apparently dug his nails to far in to his forehead. Harry sat up and looked around at the white room. He saw 5 people walking cautiously towards him. .

"No... Please no more please……"Harry said barley above a whisper for his voice was fading from screaming so much. He closed his eyes tightly and hoarsely whispered "it's not real not real..."to himself. As he slowly faded from the world of the conscious

He was falling in an abyss of darkness images and sounds swirling like a tornado around him...consuming him. The pain of reliving it was unbearable. The anger the sadness the disappointment the pain… He was forced to know to keep in his mind… the farther he fell the worse the memories got

After what felt like an eternity he hit the floor. Faces appeared above him quite unclear. They faded away like smoke just to be replaced by another ...and another till finally they stopped and it all went black...

"He's going to wake up soon he's been unconscious for nearly two weeks he's got to wake up soon right?"

"I don't know. He could and he may not no one knows but him."

at first Harry wasn't sure where he was only that he was in an extreme amount of pain but then everything that happened suddenly whipped through his mind on fast forward. Harry's eyes snapped open. He saw no less than 12 people surrounding his bed. He fought his way with the immense pain and finally succeeded to sit up. The room was quite dark as it was night time and there was only a little lamp light the room but the room was in mostly shadows making it so Harry couldn't see who was there.

...he saw them launching knives and curses at him and laughing at his screams...

Harry shook the memory away and attempted to listen to the woman questioning him

"...you realize who or where you are?" he didn't answer just continued to stare "well your name is Harry potter and you are in St. Mungo's ok?" he said nothing she lit the ceiling light and Harry saw who was there. Then he did something no one expected he started to laugh.

Harry's laugh wasn't airy like it used to be it didn't really sound like it was sane or even belonged to him. The laughter issuing from his mouth scared him slightly. Just as suddenly as the laughter started it stopped and was replaced by sobbing. Harry didn't understand he didn't like it. He was pissed and at first he didn't know why but then he remembered the night he escaped they had given up on him they had stopped searching for him. It hurt so bad. He wanted it all to stop. None of it felt real for some reason. Here he was sitting on a bed in the hospital crying and laughing and feeling betrayed and pissed off beyond all means. It was like he was in an alternate reality that was slowly killing him in every possible way.

Someone touched his arm he yelped and pulled it away. He immediately stopped crying and laughing. He looked to his right and saw the tearstained face of one of his supposed best friends Hermione granger.

"H…h…harry wh…wh...what's wr...wr...wrong?" she asked shakily he growled. And she stepped back

"Y...y...you ga…ga...ga...gave up .on m...m..m...me." he said hoarsely and barely above a whisper.

"Harry ... you were gone for over 3 months. I we never gave up hope entirely but it was very unlikely that you were alive you have to understand..." Harry shook his head no tears flowing down his face the healers asked the Weasleys Hermione Lupin and Tonks to leave.. Once in the hall Ginny fell to the floor in a sobbing heap. Hermione kneeled next to her. And tried to calm her finally Ginny said the thing that they were all thinking

"Harry's gone and we're in trouble."


	5. Dreams, Memories, and a Present

Disclaimer:I still DON'T own anything that you recognize(Harry Potter)

author's notes: hope you like this chapter believe me this story does get better. and there willbe fights and even a little romance... but thats a long ways off. R&R.

CHAP 5

Dreams, Memories, and a Present

Many people were in a half circle around Harry and 'him'. Harry was stepping closer and closer to the corner backing away from the snake like looking man with a bottle and a wand in his hands.

"Pet stop moving, you know you have no choice the faster you give in the faster it ends. OK? "'Master' said in a sickly sweet voice. He continued to back up slowly but soon reached the wall and was trapped

"n...no p...p...please n...no m...more..." he stammered the man before him laughed a cold cruel laugh before striding over to him and grabbing him roughly by the arm Harry screamed as he ripped off their clothes and chained him to the wall stomach against the cold stone he felt him stand be hind him and shove himself in roughly and barley heard over his own screaming someone say "crucio" be fore he felt unbearable pain he yelled louder. Eyes squeezed tight as the room faded to black...

He felt hands on him. He yelled "NO MORE PLEASE STOP IM SORRY I DONT REMEMBER IM SORRY PLEASE STOOOOP..." he stopped fighting and the hands let go of him as he curled up into a sobbing heap he looked up and saw that he wasn't in the cell anymore but in the hospital room. "I'm sorry… I'm so sorry..." he hoarsely whispered to the people standing above him

"Harry what were you dreaming? What were they doing to you that caused you so much pain?" asked Cecilia. He didn't answer or look as if he even acknowledged that they were there

He started to hum to himself all the while. Playing with the bandage around his torso

-suddenly pictures of a cold stone wall popped up in his head "pet you have some visitors" said a cold malicious voice as a pale pointed face boy with white blond hair entered...-

Harry shook his head to get the pictures and memories to disappear. He looked up and saw the other female witch with Harry's food that looked more like a shake since it was all liquid and in a tall glass with s straw. She placed it on the table with all of the gifts she went over to him "Harry would you come back to the bed it isn't good for you to be out of it" she backed up to give him room. He flicked his wrist and his crutches were in hand and he slowly made his way to the bed and settled into it "now you need to drink your breakfast ok."

He nodded and took a sip of the weird liquid. It tasted like waffles, syrup, butter, pumpkin juice, and bacon. All in all it was pretty good

Cecilia entered with his 15 or so potions when he finished them both left one returned with lunch then dinner and more potions. It went like that for the next two days. Harry didn't get visitors because Cecilia didn't think he was ready. When ever Cecilia came in she tried to get him to talk. Harry just ignored her and hummed to himself. he felt as if he was in his own little world everything felt so surreal like it was all a nightmare where he was gonna wake up to some ones yelling back in the burrow. he wished that would happen that everything would go to the way its supposed to be however that was all he knew was that this wasn't right...he wasn't supposed to be fighting his own mind to shut up or with his memories to fuck off 'what the bloody hell is wrong with me?' floated through his head multiple times during the day

he figured out the date he arrived at the hospital was nov.15 he was unconscious for two days woke up on the17th went unconscious for four more days woke up on 20. The current date was the 24th of November…

He had sorted all of the gifts he got into 3 groups 1-food he had to put all the food in one group and away from him so he wouldn't eat it. He figured he'd give it to everyone for Christmas the 2nd group was cards and lastly the third was his birthday presents (that he hadn't opened because he couldn't bring himself to.). One stuck out among all of the brightly wrapped ones. He snapped his fingers and the black package with a blood red bow flew into his lap. On top of the package was a black envelope with what looked like blood for ink. He opened it and found a black piece of parchment with the same blood red ink. It read:

'Dear Harry Potter,

You don't know me but I know what you must have gone through to get in this ward. I ,Melina Deid, know to an extent what you've been through I heard you never had your birthday so I gave you something that helped me (it helps you to stop thinking and can calm you) and I figured you probably don't have the necessities so I gave them to you for Christmas. I know you must think I'm mad ...but its just I know what your going through as I am right next door and know what you have to go through to get in here. There are some books you might be interested in if you want to talk... I mean actually talk not the way those healers do where they interrogate you or your friends ask idiotic questions because they don't know what to say to you. But a conversation then, just knock three times on the wall across from your bed ok? tt4n

Sincerely,

Mel

Harry read this through multiple times to make sure he wasn't imagining it. he came to the conclusion that it was indeed real but he wasn't sure on whether she were mad or not she never exactly denied it but...'whatever' he thought for he wasn't in a place to question others when he wasn't even sure of his own. Pushing questions aside he grabbed the present.

The wrapping paper surprisingly was paper more like plastic. He didn't know why but he loved it the way the light was reflected off its shiny surface...the way the bow looked absolutely perfect...the way the colors clashed together magnificently. The red wasn't bright and bold like the red of Gryffindor but more...mystical. He slowly un taped the package not wanting to rip the paper or bow. He took off the paper folding it up and perching the bow on top.

He finally opened the box and found...a bunch of black and red (the same type of paper as the wrapping paper.) tissue paper. He pulled it all out and found the presents he pulled out the bigger of the two and found himself looking at a black, oval thing. It was about 6 inches high, 9 long and 4 wide. On the front it had red colored screen but it was a lot thicker than a normal screen. there were a lot of buttons with symbols like triangles squares and arrows with the words 'fast', 'forward', 'rewind', 'play', 'stop', and 'pause'. On the top there was a large squarish shape with a small square button at the lower right hand corner reading 'open'. Feeling quite confused he looked for the second thing she said that she had given him

He found at the bottom of the box a square plastic thing with a black circular piece of some kind of metal. It had in red ink the words 'rock mix by Mel.' around the edge. On the back of the case type thing was a piece of black paper on the inside with a bunch of numbers from one to 50 in the red ink. Next to each number was a name or title of some sort. Such as 'Mudvayn', 'Stainded', 'Rob Zombie', 'Slipknot', and 'Limbizkit'. After these were more words. Harry hadn't a clue he thought he had seen Dudley with something like it but he never really paid attention to it.

He looked around the room checking to make sure no one had entered. (He sometimes got so lost in his thoughts that he didn't realize people, usually nurses, had entered.) Because no one really realized that he was actually reading the books he had received (they were the only gifts he actually opened.) He assumed that they thought him to be mentally unstable like the Longbottoms. (The weird thing was he wasn't sure that he wasn't.) But he did and he absorbed every word. Learning many spells and charms that he knew most couldn't perform properly.

He flicked his wrist and a bedside table appeared. With another flick his (what he guessed to be) radio was on it along with the box and accessories. He thought about trying to get it to work for a minute but decide against it. Instead he laid back against his pillows. He had just barely gotten into a comfortable position (which in itself was saying something) when his personal nurse Cecilia entered the room. He continued to study the clouds outside the slowly darkening window. She approached his bedside and conjured up a chair and sat on it clipboard in hand looking/studying him before she started her usual nightly questions (which he ignored as always). After about 10 minutes she gave up and summoned his potions and managed to get him to swallow them. He slowly started to drift off into the wonderfully dreamless sleep thanks to the dreamless sleep potion. Harry never realized that the next day was going to be one of his hardest yet...


	6. Hospital Visitors

Disclaimer:I don't Own Harry potter or anything you recognize in this story.

Author's Notes: Thanks to all that have reviewed... Which is a very small amount unfortunetly. Anyway this chapter has drastic 'images' quite grotesque if you don't like... then don't read. R&R.

CHAPTER 6

Hospital Visitors

Harry potter slowly opened his always pain filled green eyes and looked instinctively to the window. It was bright and sunny out. He remembered some of the great times he'd had at this time of year with the Weasleys. running around throwing snowballs at each other... he squeezed his eyes shut knowing that he'd be stuck with crutches and/or a cane for most of if not the rest of his life. Shaking away those thoughts Harry finally noticed that he was not alone in the room.

Around his bed and him were the Weasleys lacking Percy but with Fleur. Along with Tonks, Lupin, and Hermione. Harry sat up pushing himself with his arms till his back was against the white wall behind him. He tied to move his legs but only felt a slight pain like a needle. He gave up after a few minutes. Everyone was staring at him he didn't know what to do or say. He settled for staring at each of them.

Mrs. Weasley moved closer to him. he saw as if it were in slow motion her spreading her arms to envelope him in a hug...images of a snake like man going in for a 'hug' but just be fore the contact he pulled out a long sword and stabbed him twice 1ce in the stomach then in the chest...

Harry leaned clutched his chest and found the bandage that he knew covered the gashes that would leave a scar once an antidote was found to heal the wounds...

Harry bent over coughing up blood and clutching at the fresh wounds. "so you never forget your place" 'he' whispered into his ear before carving what he saw to be 'PET' into his upper left arm. The thing licked the cuts that he was sure gone down to his bone, and poured salt into it making it burn. He felt his bleeding torso being pushed up against the wall. He saw the snake like man bend foreword and lick the wounds before stretching them open and pouring a strange liquid into all of his wounds...'

Harry leaned foreword and vomited all over his lap breathing deeply he looked and saw that the vomit was blood... his blood Harry started to heave again. And again. He faintly heard the many worried voices. Harry soon stopped heaving and sat back against the wall eyes closed tight and attempting to breathe properly. People were asking him questions but he didn't care because he was just trying to breathe every breath he took hurt so he had to take short breaths to lessen the pain. He opened his eyes and looked around he saw bright lights dancing before him as well as people going back in forth and looking at him worriedly. Or at least he thought they were as they were blurry despite the fact that he had his glasses on. The dots started to turn black clouding his vision. He heard a horribly familiar sound of dripping water the terrible smell of vomit, fecies, and blood mingling in the damp air... his own screaming and someone's maniacal laughter filled his brain.

Then just as suddenly as it had appeared, the memory disappeared. The black spots slowly faded and he was back to normal again. Well as normal as he was before. All his visitors around his bed pale faced, even Fred and George were pale. Mrs. Weasley rushed to his side sobbing about how sorry she was. He didn't answer. Cecilia asked him how he was and where he hurt. He wanted to yell at her for asking such a stupid question how the fuck was he supposed to feel. It's not like she hadn't looked his body over completely when he got there.

After a while the healers left him alone with his guests. He started playing with his fresh bandages (the other one had been changed as they still couldn't figure out how to close them) wrapped around his skeletal chest.

"Well Harry why don't you open your birthday presents?" Fred said nervously handing Harry a box wrapped in colorful paper. He shivered at the memory fighting to come forth... it was a little hangman if Harry was remembering properly. He also had several defensive books from Ron and Hermione. He got a Weasley jumper from Mrs. Weasley. From Ginny and Lupin however he got 2 things he knew he wouldn't be looking at in a long time if ever. Photo albums. Ginny said hers had pictures of all of his Hogwarts years and that there was still room left for more if he wanted to add any. Lupin said that the one him and Tonks made had his baby pictures along with his parent's time at Hogwarts. Along with bits his parents journals, and letters. What was worse was that there was also Sirius' whole journal from once he got out of Azkaban.

He guessed that they thought that he might look at them but they were sadly mistaken. Harry was pissed that they would give him those. 'Can't they understand that I just want to forget? That I'd rather be dead. That I' he shook away those thoughts and tried to listen to what Mrs. Weasley was saying...

"...we had thought that you had wanted some alone time at first but when Ron said you weren't in your room. We got worried. But once Hermione said that you had said that you would wait till after the wedding before going to Godrics Hollow. So we figured that we'd wait a week and then floo over but you weren't there..." Harry cut her out of his thoughts. 'So when I was being tortured all the while telling myself that they would be looking for me and would find me they were sitting on their asses doing nothing!' Harry thought angrily he tuned them out ignoring their reasons. He had always been there to save or help them. And when the time came for them to save him and his battered soul they can't do it? He wanted to scream. To yell at them and punch something till his knuckles bled...

He shook his head and was abruptly brought back to reality by Mrs. Weasley saying that they were going to go get lunch. Harry suddenly realized that all of the adults minus Mrs. Weasley and Lupin had gone. Hermione, Ron, and Ginny stood with the older female and exited the room.

Harry looked at his former defense against the dark arts teacher. He looked thinner and paler than Harry remembered him. There were more wrinkles and grey hairs as well. Harry was sure he himself looked little better if at all.

"Harry I'm sorry I didn't get to you. I tried ...but..." Lupins voice faded. "please just say one word anything please Harry?" the weary man before him pleaded tears filling his tired eyes. Harry had to turn away. He didn't want to hurt anyone but he didn't know what there was to say 'oh hi yeah ...' it wasn't simple like that any more. It was all different. Before he would never have tried to tune out people but now he rarely listened. Never mind talking...

The 2 youngest Weasley children and Hermione had returned by the time he entered the real world. Lupin and Mrs. Weasley were however absent.

The three of them stared around the room. Hermione turned to him and their eyes met. He knew what she was going to do. He was sure she was going to start talking and try to get him to join in. she leaned forward in her seat that was at the end of his bed.

"Harry... I've been reading up on traumatic experiences and found that in order for you to be able to successfully put this behind you. You have to talk about it..."Harry shook his head as she continued to almost beg him to tell him what happened. Soon the other two joined in. Harry was about to just ignore them and go to sleep (well pretend to anyway) when Hermione said something that made the rage he hadn't felt for so long come alive.

"...come on Harry you can get out of this situation we're here for you well do anything to help you just tell us what happened and you can be back to normal ..."

Harry couldn't believe his ears he looked her strait in the eye. She saw a spark she had never seen before in Harry's pain filled green eyes. It kind of scared her.

Cecilia entered and informed the three stunned teenagers that they had to leave. Lupin came in with Mrs. Weasly to say good bye. They informed him that they would visit the next day. He heard voices outside and in came a disheveled Ginny she asked for a moment alone with him and it was granted. she walked up to the side of his bed and stared him strait in the eye sapphire blue met bright yet dull green .she leaned in closer to him elbows resting on her knees. Her hands moved and wiped away her tears.

"Harry I know that your feeling lost but I...we need you back. We need Harry back from where ever you think you are. You are our last hope." Ginny paused. Stood from the chair and made her way to the door. She put her hand on the door handle and turned back to him "please bring Harry Potter back. ...before it's too late to fulfill his... your destiny" she turned around and walked out the door to met the rest of the group.

Little did they all know that at that moment Harry was reading a letter that would change him. It was a letter from the minister...

Harry slowly broke the seal and emptied the envelope. He unfolded the parchment and read Scrimgeours neat scrawl...

Dear, Mr. Potter

I am happy that you are alright. I do not know if you realize the impact of your disappearance. Well the wizarding world was devastated. Morals were crushed. I am hoping now you will decide to help the ministry get whoever kidnapped you. I request your presence here at the ministry of magic to tell us where you were held and ...what happened so that we can go and arrest them. I await your answer. Also before we meet give serious thought to giving the daily prophet an interview to give hope to the wizarding world.

Sincerely.

Rufus Scrimgeour, minister of magic.

Harry's anger flared a loud BOOM took his attention. Harry looked and saw that there was a large whole in the wall to his left, the on with the little window. Harry felt something warm in his hand he looked down and saw a little fire ball in his palm. He gasped as he realized that his hand was covered with flames.

Harry stared at it studying the flames. The way they reached to the ceiling...it was hypnotizing. Screams brought his attention from the yellow, red, and orange flames.

Harry started shaking fear rising inside of him the flames went out. There was an eerie silence through out the room and all Harry could hear was his heart beating rapidly in his ears. Harry didn't know what he should do. So he did the only thing that came to mind...he ran. He ran from the hospital. Ran far from the accusing and frightened stares. He ran from everything. He ran from... himself...

The next day when the Weasleys, Lupin, Hermione, and Tonks arrived. All that they saw was an empty white room with a small table of gifts and 11words written in what appeared to be…

"Blood..." Tonks whispered softly as she read the words that she couldn't believe Harry wrote

"FUCK THE WIZARDING WORLD...FUCK YOU AND 'HIM' AND FUCK DESTINY!" read Ron, softly to himself. As he watched some of the blood drip down the wall. No one left the room with dry eyes...


	7. Tears

Disclaimer:still don't own Harry Potter. there is a song in this chap that I do not own either. The song is by Metallica but i do not know what it is called. I have been searching since August! anyways... Oh I almost forgot I am unsure of Harry's parents middle names so if anyone knows please tell me. much appriciated.

Author's notes: I know I am adding on a lot of chapters quite fast, but no worries once I get to chater 13 things will slow down. Well enjoy! Oh and don't forget to review!

CHAPTER 7

**_Tears_**

Harry stood before three large marble headstones, 2 covered with ivy and bits of moss he ignored the third as he knew that there was nothing beneath it as he was still, unfortunately, alive. There was a little bit of snow on all of them and the ground. How ever it didn't cover the extremely long grass that helped cover most of the three footstones that stood in the backyard of the place he was supposed to grow up.

Tears rolled silently down his face, and he fell to his knees. He reached up and pulled the ivy, moss and the grass away from the headstones tears flowing faster and faster from his empty eyes. He snapped his fingers and the stones were clean and sparkling in the light of the setting sun. Harry read the headstones in the fading light.

'LILY MARIE POTTER'

'Died 10-31-1991'

'Loving mother, wife, daughter, and friend, may she rest in peace.'

'JAMES HAROLD POTTER'

'Died 10-31-1991'

'Loving husband, father, son, and friend, may he rest in peace.'

Harry fell forward hands on the ground holding his face catching his tears as he cried for his parents, cried for Dumbledore and Sirius. Cried for the boy he used to be. The boy he would never be again.

'Why did I have to wake up? Why didn't I just wait for him to finish me' he thought o himself 'WHY DIDNT THEY JUST FUCKING KILL ME. I'd rather be dead...' he sat up and conjured two bouquets of white lilies. And placed them in front of each headstone. he then cast a charm to make sure they never died "to bad I couldn't do that for them, Sirius, or Dumbledore." he whispered o himself as he limped inside, the chipped white painted house that had a large amount of vines growing on it, with his cane.

Harry noticed that everything in the house was as it had been all those years ago. Harry knew because there was a large amount of dust all over the house. There were white sheets covering all of the furniture. Harry limped his way through the kitchen then the dining room and then finally to the stairs. He slowly made his way down the hall to the door that he knew had been his parent's room and inside

The room brought tears to his eyes as he images of his young and happy parents wearing junky clothes splattered with paint and gathering more as they splashed paint at each other laughing and smiling...

The walls and ceiling were white and silver fluffy clouds with bits of powder blue sky showing through. White and water lilies were falling down towards the thick powder blue carpet that had a thick layer of dust coating it as well as the walls and the sheet covered furniture.

Harry removed his converse sneakers not wanting to get the carpet dirty. He flicked his wrist and the dust and sheets disappeared from the large room. Leaving the large bed that had been his parents bared. It was a king size with a large fluffy white comforter and an assortment of baby blue, white, and silver pillows were laid against each other and the white headboard. There was a large sheet type thing attached to the wall (up where it meets the ceiling). There were pieces of silver rope tying the fabric on opposite sides of the bed to the wall. There were two white dressers and a white vanity whit a large mirror on It.' mom must have done her hair there' he thought to himself as he made his was to the bed.

Harry pulled a tiny box from his pocket with a thought it was enlarged to its original size. He reached down and pulled out the red and black box that held his present from Mel. he pulled out the thing he recognized as a radio (a newer version than the Weasley's) and the little flat square thing and placed them both on one of the white bed stand along with a few of the books he hadn't read yet.

he pulled the blankets and sheet down and got in to the bed that his parents had once slept in. Harry grabbed the blankets and pulled them to his face. Sobs racked through his skeletal body. Harry slowly fell into a deep and troubled sleep. Filled with sad and angry eyes, with matching faces of those that he had once considered family. Fingers were pointing at him voices were blaming him. Then there was laughter, a cold cruel laugh he had many times over his own screams...

Harry sat bolt upright in the bed. Which he immediately regretted. A sharp pain in his chest and back told him he was in the living world. He looked down at his chest and saw that his bandage and saw that his entire chest and arms were covered in blood. Harry waved his hand over himself and the blood disappeared. And he did the same for the bed as it had gathered blood as well.

Harry laid back against the pillows and looked around the walls. But once he looked directly in front of him... he stopped. Hanging on the wall was a picture of him as a baby and his parents on both sides of him holding each of his hands smiling happily. His mother was trying to flatten both his and his father's hair.

In another his parents were hugging each other and smiling at the camera with the occasional laugh or giggle. There was more like that at least one picture on each wall. Tears fell from his eyes he covered them with his hands as the sobs racked his body. He felt dirtier then than he ever had. He had allowed the murderer of his parents, godfather and professor to fuck him and to stuff himself in to Harry's...

'I failed everyone .this entire thing is my fault I should have fought back I should have avenged all of them instead I did as he asked. ...I failed ...I failed everyone...' he thought over and over. He was so lost in his own thoughts he never heard the bedroom door open or the zip of and thud of a boot coming off.

He wished he could go back and warn his parents about Wormtail so he could have a normal life...a happy one. Where he wasn't the 'chosen one' or 'boy who lived'. He wanted a family to have the chance to be a kid maybe his parents had plans for another child? ...he didn't know. Nor would he ever. He did however know that he was tired of being scared and used. He was tired of watching everything he loved disappear as he stood back and did nothing. He watched his parents, godfather (and the closest thing he had to a father), and Dumbledore die right in front of him.

Not only was his childhood taken from him but his very innocence. There was no way he could get any of it back for Voldemort took everything.

Harry clenched his fists his nails digging into his palms anger flowed through him. He looked up into the mirror on his mother's vanity and saw a pale face with sunken eyes and broken glasses and hollowed cheeks. He saw stick like arms and a ribcage without a stomach under it there were bandages on his left upper arm and around his entire torso. Tears came down faster. Harry put his hands over his face he screamed loudly into his hands. He heard a crack and was happy to see that the mirror was shattered all over the floor and vanity.

"There's no need to worry this isn't real just a dream...just a nightmare. Ron and Hermione are going to wake me up soon and everything will be fine..." he told himself before slipping into another terrifying slumber.

Aday later Harry managed to figure out how to work the radio. it was another day or threeafterhe had arrived there only eating snow before he fully understood what the 'cd' was used for.(he figured it to have taken longer because of the lack of food). He pressed play and a sort of sad sound filled the room. Harry was entranced by it. After awhile a sad voice joined the instruments. Harry felt that he understood the song in a way no one else could. Harry turned up the volume even more. After awhile a sad voice joined the instruments

_**'Life it seems will fade away...'**_

_**'Drifting farther everyday'**_

_**'Getting lost within myself'**_

_**'Nothing matters no one else'**_

_**'I have lost the will to live'**_

_**'Simply nothing more to give'**_

_**'There is nothing more for me'**_

_**'Need the end to set me free...'**_

'Wow' Harry thought. It was such a sad song.

_**'Things aren't what they used to be'**_

_**'Missing one inside of me'**_

_**'Deathly lost this cant be REAL!'**_

_**'Can not stand this HELL I feel'**_

_**'Emptiness is filling me...'**_

_**'To the point of AGONY'**_

_**'Growing darkness taking dawn...'**_

_**'I was me but now he's gone'**_

'Oh my god it's like someone stole my feelings and made a song out of it' he thought sadly tears falling from his eyes.

_**'No one but me can save myself but it's too late'**_

_**'Now I can't think of why I should even try...'**_

Harry sniffed the song was saying what he had refused to think for the last few days. He hadn't had any food but a little bit of snow. And no one was coming for him and none of it felt real he didn't understand it...

_**'Yesterday seems as though it never existed!'**_

_**'Death greets me warm... now I will just say good bye...'**_

And the song went all instrumental. Harry looked toward the ceiling trying not to cry. He knew he would soon be dead as he had run out of blood replenishing potion and still had no food. Harry listened to the music but didn't hear it. As he was too far lost in his own thoughts.

About 3 hours later the cd was starting over for the second time. Harry already feltvery light headed. Spots invaded his vision and his breathing slowed. Harry felt calm. 'this is it' he thought.' this is the end' his vision faded to black. He saw a small speck of light. And saw the outline of an angel coming closer as he fell farther back into the welcoming darkness. All he could make out was that she had long wavy hair floating around her thin frame.

"Harry" she whispered "d... d... don't leave... please... d... d... dont... not yet." her voice sounded familiar... and angelic. He couldn't place it. He gave up trying to figure out who she was. He faintly heard the depressed man singing his last line

_**'Death greets me warm...now I will just say good bye...'**_

A small smile appeared on his face at the irony and he gave into the darkness...


	8. You died

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter but I do own the new character in this chap. I do not own the song that is in this chap it is by Eminem I do not have a clue as to what it is called but it is a very good song.

Author's notes: Here's another chap hope you enjoy! And don't forget to review!

CHAPTER 8

Harry heard music. It was really good he loved it! He felt sore all over. Suddenly a female voice intertwined with the male voice. He struggled a bit but managed to open his eyes. He saw a girl bout 18 a little over 5 feet she had shoulder length layered black hair. The tips looked as if they were covered in blood. She had a pale face with black eyeliner, mascara, and eye shadow. Above and below her eyes which were completely black with a red bleeding hearts in the center. She had a black choker necklace around her neck with a skull in the middle of the sun. She was wearing a black t-shirt that clung to her thin frame with a hot pink bunny (the bunny had a wide smile and a large yellow nose.) on it. Under the bunny he saw the words "cute but psycho".

She had elbow length black gloves that had tons of cuts in them and only covered half of her fingers. Her nails were like cats nails quite long and they came to a point. They were painted black but the tips looked as if there were blood dripping towards her cuticles.

She was in a rather short black skirt with a little bit of lace around the bottom of it. It was really tight around her waist bit it loosened up gradually so it flared slightly as she did little spins. Her legs had black fishnet tights on. She wore knee high black leather high heeled boots that clung to her thin legs. The heels on them were thin and rather pointy.

She turned and noticed him fighting to sit up. He looked around the room trying to figure out where he was as she turned the music down. He saw the clouds and immediately thought 'I did it I'm finally able to be in peace.' then he saw the door. The window...the pictures... and he knew...

He chuckled slightly at first then it grew into an all mighty laughter that sounded psychotic. And still he laughed. The girl stared worriedly at him. The laughter died down but a smile stayed. It wasn't exactly a normal smile his lips were pressed together and the corners upturned but no happiness filled his dead green eyes. Just pure anger. He shook his head ('smile' still in place) slowly from left to right. Unshed tears shining in his dull eyes. The girl kneeled beside the bed

"Harry... are you ok?" she asked softly as if talking to a child

"Fuck... Off..." he rasped before going into a coughing fit. She just gave him a sorrowful look.

"Harry I know what you're going through. But allowing yourself to die won't do anything..." she said calmly. His 'smile' long gone he glared at her.

"You don't know... shit about... What I'm... fucking going through." Harry said between coughs. He conjured a glass of water and took a sip "for me it's the only choice...who the fuck are you anyway?" he asked angrily. The face that had only so far showed sympathy and happiness broke into a frown. Her eyes narrowed at him.

"My name is Melina Deid. And I would know how you feel as I have been there. And I think I can help you get (for lack of a better word) 'better'." she paused for a minute. And Harry cut her off

"Look I don't need help I just want to be alone..."He said quietly "I'm tiered of everyone. My supposed friends aren't even here trying to 'fix' me..."

"Errr...that's because they think that you're dead."She paused and at his stunned face quickly continued "actually you ...DID...die but somehow for some reason you just started breathing again. I gave them a 'copy' body and they buried it at Hogwarts." she informed. For some reason he didn't care. Not about his 'friends' about 'him' or Mel or his own life. He just didn't care. He laid back into the pillows. When a thought occurred to him 'how could I have just started breathing again?' he asked himself.

Then it hit him. "that god damned prophecy!" he whispered to himself more tears forming in his eyes "why cant I just fucking die!" he said exasperatedly.

"I'm not going to sit here and tell you to go back to the way you were to ignore what happened to you. But I sure as hell aunt going to sit here and listen to you ask for death. I'll help you to strengthen yourself and teach you things that wizards don't ever bother to lear..."Harry stopped listening to her. The music volume went higher and the song started over. The sounds of digging and sad instrumental notes filled his ears. Then a voice began sort of talking

**_'I ain't gonna eat , I ain't gonna sleep, ain't gonna breath till I see what I wanna see. And what I wanna see is you go to sleep in the dirt... permanantly you just being hurt. this ain't gonna work for me it just wouldn't be sufficient enough cause we are just gonna be enemies as long as we breath I don't ever see either of us coming to terms when we can agree there ain't gonna be no reason speakin with me you speak on my seeds and me no speak engliss so we are gonna beef and keep on beefin unless you up read and meet with me in the flesh and settle this face to face and your...'_**

Harry stopped paying attention. Whether it was a sign from someone that left him behind or pure coincidence he didn't know nor did he care. At that moment he realized that no matter what happened he wouldn't be able to die or be happy until the prophecy was fulfilled. Anger flooded through him at the realization of what he had to do. Then just as suddenly he calmed down. A smile played across his face it didn't quite reach his eyes but then again he knew it never would. at that moment he hoped Voldemort was in his head just to hear one thought...the song came to an almost end. There were gunshots and the singer was yelling and shooting his gun off crazily and laughing. Harry only smiled wider. He looked up at Mel and said the two words that changed his life forever.

"Teach me."

----------------------

Mel became his friend and in a way teacher. She went and bought all of the books he needed to have to heal the 'unhealable' wounds which he did manage though he would always have the scars.

She bought him spell books galore as well as muggle work out books. She helped him to strengthen his body to its highest potential. In no time at all (that's how it felt to him) his body was stronger with more muscles than it had ever been. (Though he still wasn't huge like a body builder).

They started dueling to practice both the many new spells from his library. (His parents had had one he just added the many tomes he had acquired to it.) within a few weeks he had managed to memorize all of the books in the library, get into the best shape of his life, eat healthy solid food (in rather small portions but it was a start), and he found a way to control his newly discovered fire power and wandless magic. He also surprisingly managed to learn ligilimens.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

32 days after he awoke from the dead Harry was awoken by Mel's shouts of glee...

"What are you on about Mel?" he asked stifling a yawn and stretching.

"Happy new year!" she yelled happily or as happy as she ever got. He learned that she was never truly happy. But she never let her depression keep her down just like he never let his PTSD control him.

"Oh shit" he mumbled. They had made a promise. (Well actually she ordered him but same difference) that on new years day he would let her give him a makeover.

"Yes... yes... yes... look Harry I know we agreed on just clothes but your different then you were before so I was hoping that we could get some piercings together. Ok?" she asked worriedly. at his shocked look she continued "look I never really got you a Christmas present and I have some plans cause I was gonna get my nose done..."she trailed off. He knew what she meant though. She wanted to get her nose pierced. He didn't mind 'cause truth is told he had wanted to go and get a trench coat and boots and...

He nodded "yeah I'll let you go crazy with shopping k? Plus I want a few things and your the only one that I could trust with helping me get clothes for a new look." to say Mel was pleased was an understatement. He was glad she was so happy. He hated to see her sad. He felt like she was his sister and his responsibility despite the fact that she had been taking care of him.

She ran off to get dressed. He pulled on a pair of baggy jeans a black muscle t-shirt and a Slipknot sweatshirt (he now knew what it meant it was the name of a really good rock band from America.) he also hid his scar with magic so that it would be hard even for moody to see through it.

He had learned that Mel was a witch from America whose (wizard) father was a Dj on a rock station in Florida, gave her magical radios that allowed her to listen to American or Britain stations. She had come to Britain because her mother blamed her father for what happened to her.

Mel entered the room the same outfit she had wore the day he met her (it was her favorite outfit) she grabbed her long black trench coat that clung to her upper body.(it looked quite similar to the coat neo wore in the matrix. which is why she liked it so much)

They looked at each other she told him where they were going as he had never been there before and they apparated away

They landed in an empty alley she steered him into the nearest shop he barely had time to see the sign which read 'HOT TOPIC'

"It's an American store. And it's muggle but its owned bye a wizard." was all Mel said before she went searching for clothes. It was very dark in the store. And there was rock music playing. He went to the shoe section where right away he saw a pair of large black leather boots with a few silver buckles. he grabbed them and tried them on they fit perfectly taking them off and slipping his trainers back on he put them on the counter as Mel came from between two rows with a pile of clothes in her arms. She placed them on the counter and handed him a t-shirt and a pair of black baggy cargo pants that had some chains and straps all over them. She told him to put them on he went and did as he was told.

"I want to see..." she said from outside his changing room."Ooooh... I like these boots."

The t-shirt fit perfectly hugging his muscular body so people would be able to see his six pack. The pants were rather long and dragged on the ground slightly. The waist was slightly too big but a belt could fix that. Holding his pants he stepped out of the changing room. Mel put her hands over her mouth and grabbed a belt from the pile as well as the boots and a trench coat similar to hers but more manly. Once he had it all on he heard a voice behind him say...

"Hhhmmm...very nice... very nice indeed. Would you like to just wear that out then?" the store clerk asked. The man had his lip and ears pierced and were dressed in black (like him). He liked it and nodded. They paid and the bags were shrunk and put in Harry's pocket. Once outside he asked Mel something he wanted to know for a while

"Err... Mel does it hurt to get something pierced?" he asked

"Harry it's all in your head if you believe that it will hurt then it will why you want something pierced...oh Harry come with me..."she said running down the ally (neither of them could stand to be touched and so she never grabbed his arm)

They stopped outside a tatoo and piercing parlor. They slowly walked in. Mel got her nose piercing and Harry got his bottom lip, leftright cartilage, left earlobe, and left eye brow. He also got some tatoos. he got a tatoo of a band of high jade green and black flames going around his right bicep and three words on his upper back 'PAYBACKS A BITCH'in the same colored flame letters. They then went to a hair salon where Harry got emerald green highlights and Mel got a touch up. (It was all done by magic so they didn't have to be touched)

They paid their money and left the shop together. Once outside she turned to him. And reached in her pocket

"Harry I got these for you. Their real leather and are for guys..." she trailed off and handed him a pair of gloves. He took them. Had he just met her he wouldn't understand why she was making it a big deal about gloves. But he did. He knew she hid scars under her many pairs (she had at least twenty). And each pair seemed to match an outfit.

"You didn't have to..."

"No I wanted to your like my brother." she said. Had she been another girl she probably would have cried or had tears in her eyes but she didn't cry that was something she refused to do. He smiled. A real smile, for the first time since he had left. She too smiled as he put them on. "Gloves make it easier to shake hands if you have to. 'Cause technically you're not being touched." she chuckled "Anyways I'm not finished with you yet. We both know how your blinder than a bat" they shared a laugh and started walking further down the ally

"yeah and your point is?" he asked

"That when you do face him it'll be an obvious weakness. So we're going to my eye doctor so I can pick up my contacts and you can get lasic..." Harry stopped short he knew what lasic was as she told him about a few days before. He gave her an odd sort of look "ok why don't we just get you some contacts... clear ones so if you ever don't want to where your glasses you don't have to Kay?" He nodded and the entered the eye place. He got his tests done and they had some in that particular prescription still in stock. Once they paid and left. They prepared them selves to apparate.

Suddenly Harry heard a familiar whisper but it wasn't Mel. He turned every which way but couldn't find it. Then it said something he didn't quite understand it. The voice repeated it he understood but didn't want to. The alley melted into a small cold room there was a dripping sound coming from one of the walls.

"Take it into your mouth, pet" a tall thin man said in a cold voice while he was standing above a kneeling figure that Harry recognized right away.

"N...n...no p...p...please d...don't m... make me please!" he heard him self plead .a slap across the face was his price it sent him sprawled a cross the stone floor he quickly got into the position he had been in before and took the creatures member into his mouth.

"that's right you ungrateful whore take the whole thing in!" the thing above him said grabbing his head and pulling him closer forcing the throbbing member farther into his mouth causing him to gag...the room faded to black

Harry saw the alley again Mel was kneeling before him. He was in the fetal position staring right and left he felt a cold wall bump against his back as he was rocked back and forth.

"Harry, are you ok?" Mel asked in a calm voice he nodded

"yeah fine." he said though she knew him wasn't. They figured out what was wrong with him days ago so she knew what must have happened.

he stopped rocking and stood up running a hand through his hair." so where to?" he asked. She sighed

"well ...you remember that guy I told you about that has a martial arts and yoga place in this neighborhood?" she asked he nodded cautiously slow. "Well I thought we could go there...?" he gave her a look that said 'do I have to?' "Well he's starting to teach sword fighting and I know you love swords..."she trailed off

"Alright but I ain't doing any yoga" he said

20 MINUTES LATER

"I can't believe I'm doing yoga"


	9. Plans and Realizations

disclaimer: still don't own anything you recognize

author's notes: FYI there will be unappropiate language in the following chpaters and probably throughout the story. If there are any terms or other such things that you find offensive or is incorrect PLEASE do tell me so that I can fix it. Thank you and hope you enjoy and Review!

Chapter 9

**PLANS AND REALIZATIONS**

They walked into a good sized room with lots of light. The floor was all sand and there were three mats in a triangle type thing. The one in the front had an old little asian looking man with his black hair tied up in a bun sitting cross legged on it. Upon hearing Harry talk he spoke

"Harry Potter I see that the news papers are wrong again and you still alive." the little man said opening his eyes which were yellow and had pupils like a cats. "I also see that neither of you have dressed appropiatly.'tut tut', well there are changing rooms over there" he said pointing to a sliding door to Harry's left. "And in there you will find a closet of clothes, pick what ever you want. If you want to buy them you pay after class." he said

the two of the went through the sliding door and saw two doorways one with a little stick figure with a triangle for a dress over it the other with a plain stick figure. They entered the respective rooms. Harry found the little closet. he picked a pair of loose black pants (that he swore looked like the ones that he had briefly saw in a Jackie Chan movie), a black wife beater, and a black asian styled shirt(that had the fancy buttons made from string). asian shirt and pants were mad of fine silk. And Harry already knew that he was buying a couple of outfits.

He checked to make sure his little bandage things were on his tatoos and his clothes, boots and money locked up tight. He exited. Mel was just exiting her changing room as well. She had on a Chinese styled black silk dress with designs of dragons on it in red and it had two long slits from the waits down. She had similar pants that he had. The little old man motioned them to sit on a mat. They did.

"My name is Sacura. Today we are going to start with the art of yoga to stretch our bodies and relax our minds so we can further concentrate and master the martial arts and sword. Let us begin. Just copy what I do to the best of your ability. We will hold each pose for six deep breaths. Let us begin." Sacura said and stood his back facing them. He went into several pretty easy poses but then they had to balance on one foot. Harry was apprehensive but tried. He was quite surprised when he got it. he didn't know how long they had been doing it but they soon went into the last pose which was lying down on the mats arms to the side palms up eyes closed and just concentrating on his breathing he liked it. All his thoughts just melted away. His frustration and despair... gone. It was all too soon that Sacura told him to open his eyes and slowly stand up.

Sacura tuned toward him and Mel.

"Now we will start with the martial arts. What I am about to teach you is a mixture of karate, yoga, and samurai martial arts. It is highly effective for strengthening and toning your body." Sacura informed. The movements were slow and controlled as they shifted into each move. There were no pauses except when they added the swords. It was quite beautiful even though Mel and Harry kept tripping over themselves.

About 1 hour later Harry and Mel were exiting with a couple more shrunken bags of clothes. They were walking up the street by the hot topic. They apparated back to Godric's Hollow. He continued to go back to Sacura. Who began teaching him everything he knew. By the end of two weeks on January 14th, Sacura informed him there was nothing else he could do as he already knew it all and more as Harry had gotten as many books on the martial arts and such things as he possibly could. And had read them all.

Harry went home that day deep in thought knowing that he had to find the horcruxes or he would lose for sure. He knew that he had missed something...he thought back to all of the people he had ever heard of that had a name beginning with **R**. He made it up to the summer before fifth year before something clicked. _**'REGULUS BLACK** Sirius' brother had been murdered by either Voldemort or one of his death eaters'_ he thought to himself _'but what if there was something more?..._" he got up from his bed and apparated to number 12 Grimmauld place. It was barren. He walked up to the old house and passed the door.

He walked up the stairs quietly not wanting to see if there was anyone in the house. He walked to the drawing room which was exactly as he remembered it. He lit a few candles and went to the glass cabinets. And dug around in them hoping it was still there...

"Bingo" he whispered as he pulled out the locket that no one had been able to get open. He closed the cabinets and went and sat in a nearby chair locket still in hand. He waved his gloved hand over the front and sure enough the concealment charm used on it came off revealing Slytherin's crest. Harry smiled to himself before thinking up any possible spell to get it to open.

Aftertwenty minutes Harry was getting angry at the silver trinket. Before he remembered what Dumbledore had had to do in order to get into that despicable cave so long ago... he conjured a dagger and pulled off his left glove, and pressed the dagger into his palm. Harry said a little spell he had read in one of his many books with blood involved and pressed Slytherin's crest into the small puddle of blood on his palm. There was a hissing type sound coming from him and the locket. Then to his happiness the locket popped open and he was sure that it was now 'disabled'. He hooked the locket around his neck and looked inside...it was empty.

Harry apparated back to his home and went directly to bed. Not even bothering to change into his bed clothes (i.e. his boxers). he fell into a deep sleep that got destroyed by a nightmare.

------------------

Harry was standing in a world of black huge pairs of eyes circling him. all of them were familiar there were light brown ones, sapphire blue, hazel, and amber then there were deep brown, emerald a pale blue that he knew was lacking a twinkle, and a deep hazel. All of them were looking at him with disappointment. Tears came to his own eyes "IM SORRY..."he yelled to them. The eyes just started to drift further from him "I'm sorry... so sorry..." he mumbled, looking at the black floor.

He looked up and saw a pair of blood red eyes with reptile pupils. They stared at him with happiness. The face he never wanted to see again slowly came from the darkness. A smirk was formed on the lipless lips. "You liked it whore..." the face of Lord Voldemort whispered. Harry shook his head as the head went on saying things like "**you wanted it**." and "**you deserved it**" the very thoughts Harry had worked so hard to bury deep into the past. Were now being said...

"NOOO..."

---------------

Harry screamed and sat bolt up right immediately silencing his screams. He brought cold and shaky hands to his damp and clammy face he took a deep breathe with his hands still covering his face. He fell back against the pillows and ran his hands through his damp hair leaving them entangled near the back of his head. Tightly gripping his hair as if to pull it out, which he was very tempted to do.

He was so sick of the nightmares that occurred every time he went to sleep. Which in itself was becoming rare...

Harry removed his hands from his hair and reached to turn the cd playeron and grab his glasses. It came on blasting; he dragged his sore body from his bed and grabbed his exercise clothes (which were his clothes he had got from Sacura.). He skipped the over shirt and just wore his black wife beater and black pants. And went to the center of the floor and began his martial art and yoga workout...

Staind's sorrowful and pissed off songs rang throughout the room as he slowly slid from pose to pose, swords in hand...

Half hour later Harry lay on the floor panting and sweaty. Harry went to scratch the back of his neck but found that there was a chain there he followed it to he front where he found a locket ...he suddenly remembered and sighed in contempt _'I finally got a missing piece of Voldemort and he still don't realize that I know or that I'm even alive!_' he thought with a chuckle _'only 2 left to find and 2 more after that to kill. Now where could one be?_'

He laid there on the floor for a long time till he came up with 3 possible places. _'1 the forbidden forest cause there would be plenty of protection and he wasn't in the castle that long but he may have gotten into the chamber of secrets without too much hassle...then threes the place he first killed that had to have been important to him..._' he thought about it for hours and began pacing but still came to no solid conclusion.

He glanced at the stack of books on his bedside table and it hit him. The only logical conclusion available. _'I have to get the pensive'_


	10. Drawings and More Plans

Disclaimer:Do NOT own HP or any other things you may recognize from the books. But Melina I do claim!

Author's notes: sorry for the long wait. Been quite busy. Anyways chap 10 is up read and enjoy... Oh and review! the more I get the faster the chapters will come! sorry this is so short.the next will be longer.

CHAPTER 10

**_Drawings and More Plans_**

Harry heard the door to his room being pushed open and looked up to see Mel enter with a tray of food. He dipped his quill into the ink again and attempted to finish his latest sketch. After a few seconds he felt it was finished and shrunk the sketch pad back to its mini size and went to put it in the bedside table drawer but Mel grabbed it. He sighed and grabbed one of the plates knowing that if his plan were to work he had to have some energy.

"Harry this last one is amazing! How did you even think of it?" Mel asked. He shrugged and swallowed

"I dunno I just drew let the hand take over... but I'm thinking of getting another tattoo so those are going to be some ideas. What one do you think is better?" he asked

"Well it depends on where you're getting it. If it's on the back then the phoenix in the flaming lily." He nodded at her response. Then looked up astonished

"You see the lily?"

"Yeah the phoenix is in the middle of the lily that's on fire. You should name the flower 'cause it's a new creation. And lily on fire is a little long..." again he nodded and thought for a second before saying

"Fire lily. Yeah I think that I'll get that one today after I go to get Dumbledore's pensieve..." he trailed of into his own thoughts of what could happen if he messed up.

"Harry what did you say? You can't go back to Hogwarts if you get caught you'll be in deep shit! They'll want you to stay and... and..."

Look I have no other choice I have to find the last of the horcruxs. I got one last night but it was only chance that Ron and Hermi...shit! Fuck!" he hissed "I have to see if they got to one yet...shit this could ruin everything...aaaww fuck!"

"Fuck is right, now you have to get eye contact with one of them and see if they found and destroyed any of them? This is gonna be fun!" she said excitedly and took a bite of eggs. Harry's head snapped up

"Err you ain't going. I have to do this..."

"No Harry I'm going whether you fucking like it or not! I saved your life you owe me. Not to mention that I feed and clothe you..."Mel was pissed and Harry could tell. But he couldn't help but laugh. She stopped mid rant. "what the bloody fuck is so fucking funny?" Harry laughed harder. Once he got control of himself he managed to say

"Sorry but you sounded like a mother there for a second with the 'I feed and clothe you.' you have to admit that was funny." she cracked a smile and nodded. "Ok you can go it could help to have another person. Err you could look into Hermione's head or Ron's and I'll go to the headmistresses office..." Mel was bobbing him head to the song 'when worlds collide' but once he finished talking she looked up and nodded before getting up and dancing.

Harry chuckled softly. He saw that she was in skin tight red tank top and short shorts that were black. 'If there was Ron or any other guy here they would be speechless.' he thought. For she did fill out rather well he had to admit. With her small waist, slim hips, and good sized breasts not to mention her stunning face with or without make up (though he had never seen it without any... he could still guess) and slender legs. She was all in all quite a knock out. He stood to get his knives and swords ready can't be too prepared as moody would say "CONSTANT VIGILANCE". He told Mel to go and get ready because they were going to be leaving at 6pm. and he knew how long it could take her to get ready.

Harry was proved to be correct because she entered once with a skirt and stilettos on. The next time a corset and a knee length skirt.

"Look Mel I'll tell you exactly what you should wear ok?" she nodded. "how about the black pants you got from Sacura and a tank top?" she shook her head no in disgust. He sighed

"Oh! How about my leather pants and a tank top?" she asked uncertain he nodded in approval

"Oh it's going to be cold so where your trench coat! And some kind of boot!" he yelled after her. He went to his closet and grabbed another black wife beater, a pair of baggy black cargo pants with out the chains and bondage straps, his combat boots, and his trench coat. He put it all on hid his scar and checked to make sure the one on his left shoulder was still hidden. Then he set out 4 different swords and 8 different knives on the bed.

Mel entered in a skintight pair of black leather pants and a blood red tank top that showed a little bit of her cleavage. (He could also see her black bra straps) and high healed boots. He sighed knowing that it was the best he was going to get. In her arms was her trench coat. Which she dropped once she saw the weapons on the bed. Each in itself a piece of art.

"You can pick 3 of the knives and a sword. If you want." Harry informed her while he grabbed the 2 katana swords and two knives. Each knife went in a different boot and the swords criss crossed on his back she ignored the swords and just slipped 2 knives in her boots. And 1 on her wrist with her wand. Harry went to his trunk and grabbed his wand and invisibility cloak. 'Cant be too safe' he thought to himself as he handed her the cloak. "It's safe this way you can get closer to them." he said "oh yeah here's a picture so you know who your looking for." he said handing her a picture of himself an Ron and Hermione by the lake smiling and laughing together

"Aaawwe... you look so cute" she said with a smile, he frowned "your no fun."

She put the cloak down and pulled her hair back into a ponytail with a hair tie. He put the remaining weapons away and slipped his trench coat on. And handed her hers which she put on and grabbed the cloak from the bed and his mini sketch pad.

"For afterwards you said you were getting a tattoo." she reminded. He nodded and put it into his back pocket with his money

"you ready?" he asked she nodded and he checked to make sure his glasses were in his pocket as he had his contacts in. and they apparated away to Hogwarts both thinking that it would be done within 15 minutes tops. Neither realized how much things had changed in Hogwarts with the passing of the headmaster.


	11. Confrontations

Disclaimer: still don't own anything you recognize from the HP books.

**_Warning: there is bad language in this chap. You have been warned_**

Author's notes: all reviews are welcomed! do review! enjoy!

CHAPTER 11

**CONFRONTATIONS**

Harry and Mel arrived just outside the castle gates. It was raining heavily he turned to Mel "we have to hurry. We need as much time as possible." Harry said. "put the cloak on" she nodded and did as instructed.

He walked to the gates and slid between them with ease and did the invisible Mel. And they quickly made their way up to the castle doors. Harry prayed silently that the doors wouldn't squeak and as if they heard the doors did not make a sound. But their shoes did. Harry cast silencing and cleaning charms on their feet and shoes.

"That's the great hall go in and look for them try not to bump into anyone ok? Or to even breathe too loudly." Harry whispered. Mel whispered "ok." and left. He quickly made his way to the gargoyle statues that guarded the head's office using all the hidden passageways as possible. Once he made it there though he realized that he didn't know the password. And to make matters worse he didn't know what type of word McGonagall used. Dumbledore always had a candy for it but that didn't seem right for McGonagall.

"err...survive?" he said curiously nothing happened "Dumbledore...light...safety.." he continued to guess for what he thought was ten minutes then he thought of something "potter?" the gargoyle moved and Harry quickly made his way up the stairs to the door.

Harry pushed it open and immediately went to the closet that he knew held the pensieve...he opened it and...It was empty!

"Shit!" he hissed and started going around the office opening everything. Five minutes later still nothing everything but 1 desk drawer open. He took a deep breath and pulled the drawer open and he sighed in relief at the sight of the ancient looking bowl with the silvery white substance swirling around inside. He shrunk it and placed a cover to make sure it didn't spill. He picked up the 3 inch bowl and started to place it in his trench coat pocket as he made his way to the door through the mess he had made. his hand was on the door when it slammed open hitting him in the head and sending him back a few feet where he came crashing down on a coffee table that fell apart under the impact.

Harry saw many spots and his head felt like it was broken in half. He heard several voices but couldn't make out what they were saying. His vision slowly faded to black...

---------------

Harry opened his eyes and blinked a few times to get his contacts to go back into their proper place. His head throbbed and he couldn't remember exactly why... then it came back the search the door the coffee table... He moaned in pain and pushed himself up. He looked down and saw splinters of wood under him he was still on the coffee table.

"Aaawwe... fuck that hurt" he said rubbing his head. He heard a familiar giggle a looked up to see Mel laughing at him. "Shut the fuck up. id like to see you get hit with a door and fly a few feet with out feeling anything..." he mumbled and attempting to stand up he felt someone grab his arm "get your fucking hands off me!" he hissed angrily. The hand let go and he fell to the floor he reached into his pants pocket and pulled out his shrunken cane. He enlarged it with a flick of the wrist and used it to stand up, blinking back the pain.

He saw that there was McGonagall, Lupin, moody, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny as well as Mel standing there. Mel walked over to stand next to him and whispered.

"The man with the weird eye saw through the cloak before I could check."

"Fuck" he whispered. He turned to the people before him "Well we'll just be going then..."he said motioning for Mel to follow as he started walking towards the door.

"Oh no you won't ya little..."Moody growled and sent a stunner at him and Mel. Harry reflected it and turned to the old man

"Now that wasn't very fair trying to get from behind now was it?" he said fighting a smirk at the stunned looks on their faces. "Alright what do you want to know?" he asked with an irritated look.

"Err... why don't we sit down and talk more civilized?" McGonagall said shakily Harry nodded and flicked his wrist and the room was back the way it had been. He then conjured 5 wood chairs and 2 cushiony armchairs with extra stuffing for himself and Mel 1 in blood red and the other in emerald green and the headmistress had her own chair. Harry went to the emerald green one and plopped down into it and ignored the pain that went up his spine. he sat in it with his legs dangling over the arm towards the door and his head on the other arm closer to Mel who was sitting like a lady in her chair her arms laid gracefully on the arms of her chair. Her eyes staring at the people in front of her. Mel and Harry were on the side of the large desk while everyone else sat in front.

"Well first off what are your names?" McGonagall asked with a piece of parchment in front of her. Quill already poised to begin scratching down their answers.

Harry thought for a second before a smirk appeared on his face and he leaned his head back to look at Mel she got the hint and a smirk appeared on her face as well.

"I am Yrrah Rettop(pronounced as 'why rah' 'ret top')"Harry had to bite his lip to keep from smiling

"I'm Anilem Died (pronounced as 'an ill em' 'died' exactly as it looks)" Mel said with a slight smirk. The magical quill wrote it down without anything to help it. As the 6 other people in the room stared astonishedly at them. Harry got an idea. he looked Hermione in the eye and slowly broke through her defenses and began the search...it took awhile but he did find that they had indeed find one ravenclaws books in a book case at riddle manor they had it in the castle but had been unable to disarm it. Harry knew that he had to stay he cursed his luck. He quickly repeated the process to Ginny and found that she indeed knows everything... Harry knew that he had to stay he cursed his luck.

"You look really familiar have I met you before?" Hermione asked looking at Harry intently. Harry chuckled darkly

"Just for almost 8 years but what ever..." he said studying his leather gloved hands."Jeez moody I would have thought that you would have figured it out by now with your eye and everything... I must be pretty damn good to be able to fool you!" Mel laughed.

"Harry?" Lupin asked nervously Harry smiled. And saw everyone shiver slightly. He knew it must be slightly scary to see a smile that doesn't reach the eyes. And have the eyes look empty or hollow of everything. He nodded

"Yeah if you spell yrrah rettop backwards then you get Harry Potter. Same for anilem died. She is really Melina deid." he told them as if it were the most obvious thing in the world "you guys look as if you've seen a ghost" and indeed they did. They paled and their eyes widened. Mel stared at him confused and leaned closer to his head.

"What the fuck are you doing?" she whispered angrily

"I'll explain later" he whispered back

"You're not Harry because he has 'the' scar and you don't" Ron said Harry sighed and waved his hand over his fore head allowing his scar to be seen.

"Happy now?" he asked

"But Harry died" Hermione said

"yes but I gave him the proper potions and managed to bring him back and gave you guys a dummy identical to Harry." Mel informed. Together Harry and Mel told them a summary of what had happened once he came back. Mel told most as Harry's head was throbbing and he didn't have any booze which pissed him off slightly as he felt anger just welling up inside of himself. Harry's hands began to shake which was never a good sign. He conjured some fire whiskey and got a nasty look from everyone Mel included.

"What?" he asked innocently " I already know the story...I was there. I don't really need to relive it. "He said taking a swig from the bottle the hot liquid slid down his throat leaving flames in its wake.

"Mr. Potter I would appreciate it if you did not drink during this serious conversation..." McGonagall said but was cut off

"I would have appreciated being rescued but you know we don't always get what we want." he snapped. Before he quickly drained half of the bottle. And he finally felt calm "sorry bit grouchy from getting my head beaten with a door...who opened it anyway?" he asked ignoring the fire in his mouth throat and stomach.

"I did" the headmistress said "now I need to see both of your arms" she asked

"Why the fuck would I Harry Potter want to even be in the same fucking room as a living death eater after all the bull shit I went through with them?"

"Oh now it is after both Dumbledore and Sirius get killed because of death eaters inside the castle? Not to fucking mention me almost getting killed how many times? If I am not mistaken that is ...5 years out of six oh and not to mention the dumbass dementors of my third year." They all stared dumbstruck at him as he ranted all of the things he had wanted to say. Including Mel. But then again she never heard of the things that had happened in all of his school years (except for fourth and little bits of fifth).

"Err he could come back to school..." Hermione suggested

"Where is your wand anyway?" Ron asked. Harry thought for a second, cocking his head slightly to the side and fighting the buzz he had

"Err that is a good question" he said with a chuckle. He looked at Mel and saw that she was in a silent fit of giggles with the nearly empty bottle of fire whiskey. He laughed and reached in to his trench coat pocket and grabbed the wand in question as well as the pensieve. "Here's my wand and the little pensieve. And no professor you can't have it back I need it ok? Ok" he said Ron started laughing at him and Harry laughed too. Moody and Lupin also managed to crack a smile. Ginny, Hermione, and McGonagall gave Harry and Mel scolding looks a few minutes later Harry and Mel came most of the way down from their buzz.

"Professor may Mel join as well?" Harry asked actually more like told.

"Fine you'll get your schedules on Monday in the meantime I need to contact you old school Ms. Deid." McGonagall said Mel told her that she had gone to Winnisquam's school for witch craft and wizardry in America. And then said something quite surprising

"I dropped out halfway through my sixth year though..."she murmured."So where am I going to sleep?" she asked quickly

"Well you'll have to be sorted here put this on your head..." McGonagall said levitating the hat to her. Where it plopped down on her head. It took nearly 5 minutes till it finally yelled "GRYFFINDOR" the headmistress levitated the hat back to its shelf and told Hermione to show her the seventh year dorms. They all stood to leave every one was out the door and Harry stopped for a second

"Oh professor tomorrow Mel and I are going to go and get our things good night." and he exited the room...only to walk into Ron.

Harry jumped back and hissed before turning and walking down the stairs and past the gargoyle to where Mel was standing fidgeting in the middle of the hallway.

He walked to her side and whispered in her ear

"I'll get you what you need once they go to bed...I promise. Besides I need something myself..." he said with a light but serious chuckle. He managed to get her o smile and nod. He himself felt like breaking something...

Ron, Hermione, and Ginny came walking quickly down the stairs 'obviously moody don't trust me...' Harry thought to himself with a smirk. He waited till they got a few feet away before speaking.

"Where's the book?" he demanded in question form. The three of them gave him a dumbfounded look. He sighed. "I know you all know about the horcruxes and the prophecy. So stop playing these fucking kids games I'm NOT in the fucking mood..." he growled.

"H...h...Harry what h...h...happened t...t...to you? Your not...Harry... anymore" Ginny stuttered Harry stared unblinkingly at her. As he tryed to gain control of the many cuss words longing to spill from his mouth.

"No... Harry died a while ago..."he said thoughtfully and paused to let it sink in "now moving on ... ravenclaw's book... Location?" he said gesturing with his hands to pick up the pace.

"It's in the head girl room... my room." Hermione said

"lead the way" Harry said gesturing for her to go. Hermione led them all the way to Gryffindor common room in near silence as she Ron and Ginny kept whispering together. Harry just rolled his eyes at them as they didn't seem to realize that his hearing was stronger (along with a few other things) from his personal training.

Hermione said "safety first" to the fat lady and she opened to allow them in but not before she gave Harry and Mel a dirty look.

The five of them entered the red and gold colored common room which was filled with people. Harry noticed that it was as full as it had been a few years ago.

Three people Harry thought he recognized as Dean, Seamus, and Neville walked up to the three in front of himself and Mel.

"Buggar off. We're busy I'll talk to ya later 'bout it." Ron told them and continued on.

The five of them walked to a portrait of a young girl, approximately 17 years old, reading a book. Hermione leaned forwards and whispered something into the girl's ear. The portrait swung forward on its hinges allowing them entrance. They walked in and up 3 flights of stairs to door. Hermione pushed it opened and held it open allowing them to enter.

Harry lit his finger at the darkness. He did not do darkness. Hermione lit the lights and fire place with a flick of her wand. And he blew out his finger. And looked around the large circular room. There were a few book cases a desk a large sofa wit two armchairs by the fire a large four poster a two doors he guessed went to the closet and a bathroom. The room was painted Gryffindor colors and had many pictures and what looked similar to newspaper clippings in frames nearly covered the walls. He noticed Mel looking at each in turn.

Harry walked to one of the windows and saw the lake. The beech tree they used to sit under...he turned his gaze to the pictures and slowly studied each one as he slowly walked around the room. but only made it a quarter of the way as he saw all of the pictures were of him Ron, Hermione and the Weasley's with a couple of Hermione's parents. It was almost like he was looking at another person all together. 'Picture Harry' was laughing and smiling happily goofing around with Ron and the twins... he turned his dull empty green eyes on her.

"How long ago was that one?" he asked pointing at one of the three of them laughing together in front of the burrow

"Err...it was the day you arrived at the burrow so about halfway through June." she said sounding more calm

"Wow that seems like years ago!" he said sounding slightly more chipper. He however lost it once he arrived an 11 by 14 inch frame filled with newspaper articles reading things along the lines 'HARRY POTTER KIDNAPPED' or 'THE LOST SAVIOR will he return?.' each had a picture of him and offered around 1000 galleons for him to be returned. He swiftly turned and moved toward the furthest armchair closest to the window and door. He moved it closer to the fire and sat in it normally. He put his elbows on his knees and leaned closer to the fire and just stared at it, kind of hypnotized. He loved fire. But wasn't exactly sure why. All of his drawings or close to it had fire in them. He had even found a way to (well not completely as it was mostly attached to his emotions) control it. Harry had found ways to make little flames come from his fingers so he didn't have to be in the dark. Like he had done earlier. Fire in itself was an amazing thing to Harry the way the flames moved. Their colors. The crackling sound it made...

"... Harry... Harry. Come back to reality now." Harry snapped his head up away from the orange and yellow flames.

"Wha... oh yeah... book. Sorry." Harry muttered taking the book from Ginny's outstretched hands.

The books cover was blue with silver colored symbols on it. The book itself was huge probably over 1000 pages, 14 inches or so wide and approximately 16 inches tall.

Harry ran a hand over the symbols willing them to change to English. Nothing happened. He studied the symbols for a few seconds in silence. The gears in his brain began turning trying to place the symbols. He heard something whispering into his mind. And he realized that he had seen them before in one of the books in Godric's hollow library, on a cover of a book he had past.

He stood up and motioned to Mel, who was sitting in the other arm chair, to follow him as he made his way to the door. He opened it and stood aside to allow Mel to pass. Ginny went to go through as well but he put up a shield that threw her back a few feet right into Ron and Hermione.

"You're not coming just Mel and I are going." Harry told them

"No Harry we're coming. We're your friends..." Hermione started

"Err... no. Mel saved my life so I owe her. You are 'Harry's' friends the Harry that died not mine." He said angrily. Ginny and Hermione had tears running down there faces. Ron had them in his eyes.

"Look, I know you're pissed and I understand why. But you don't know what happened here..." Harry rolled his eyes at Ron's words. "Hermione's father was nearly murdered because she was close to you. Not to mention that there was a dead body of someone that we still haven't figured out who because they were so mangled. They had carved a lightning bolt into a piece of his flesh and a there was a note saying 'the savior has fallen' so what were we supposed to think?" Ron nearly yelled. Harry was stunned. He couldn't believe it he slunk to the floor and just stared at them stunned.

Hermione got down on her knees next to him. Harry shook away the memory of himself kneeling before someone. She put a supposed to be comforting hand on his shoulder but he winced and scooted away from her. She sniffled as more tears flowed down her cheeks

"H... h... Harry you h... have t... to trust us we want to help you." Hermione pleaded

"I'm sorry but I just don't want you to get hurt..."he started

"Harry it's already to late for that we're with you tills the end." Ginny said and he knew that she was right.


	12. The Questioning Begins!

Disclaimer: don't own HP or any of the other characters you recognize from J.K.R's wonderful books. Please do not sue.

**WARNING:**There isvulgar language throught this chapter and the rest of the story. There are scene's in this chap and throught the rest of the story that should not be viewed by the younger audience as it is rather graphic.

Author's notes: thatnk you to those that did review! It is very much appreciated. Do R&R thank you and enjoy!

CHAPTER 12

**The Questioning Begins!**

Harry stood up and began to pace back and forth in front of the fire. He heard the door close with a click.

"Look... we don't have to go destroying the horcrux at this minute we could all just go to bed and work on it in the morning after you guys get back from shopping." Hermione said. Harry looked to Mel and knew what she was thinking.

"it's a good idea don't get me wrong... but I need to go to my house to get some stuff anyways so I'll just pick up some of the books that I think could help..." Harry said walking to the door again. He heard someone growl and turned around to se an irate Ginny Weasley.

"Harry we're all going to go tomorrow to get the books as well as some from the school library. But right now we're going to bed." Ginny said angrily. It was Harry's turn to growl and he did. His eyes flashed angrily at having to tell them.

"I... Don't... Sleep." He said taking a deep breath to calm himself. "The only way I sleep is with a dreamless sleep draught. Which I'm trying to get off. Did you guy's know that that stuff is actually rather addicting?" he asked calmly. Mel nodded her head to the side telling him that he was to follow. Which he did.

"You're not gonna tell them bout a certain little pill are you? Or the other stuff?" Mel asked nervously. He shook his head no. she sighed in relief.

"That's one thing I'm never telling them... actually that's another" he said turning back to his friends.

"But why do you need to go back tonight?" Hermione asked slightly confused.

"Because, I read at night and why not read stuff that I need to?" the three in front of him were stunned they however quickly shook it off.

"Harry why don't we come with you then we can help..." Ron started

"No" Harry said sternly

"Yes" said Ginny

"No"

"Yes"

"NO"

Harry landed roughly on his feet in a dark room. He quickly snapped his fingers and the many torches on the surrounding stone wall lit up, lighting the huge room greatly.

He roamed among the ancient rune book looking for the book with the same runes as the horcrux he carried in his arms. He heard two more pops and knew the others had arrived.

"I can't believe I let them talk me into it..." he mumbled to himself as he turned to face them.

"OK this is my library. Grab any book you think could help us with the runes." he told them

"Harry this is amazing!" Shrieked Hermione. He nodded and headed to a shelf that he hadn't conquered. He looked at the first book on the top shelf that was just above his head. There was a book that was just black no name or anything.

He pulled it but it only tilted and the shelf slid away from the wall, as if it were on hinges, similar to the fat lady's portrait, and just like the portrait it hid an oval opening. He looked to see if anyone had seen. He was happy that no one was even looking at him. He sighed in relief and walked through the opening he heard a snap and saw that the shelf had gone back into its proper place. He nervously snapped his fingers and his entire hand lit up. Lighting the area enough to show him that there were many torches around the walls of what looked to be a second library. He snapped his fingers again and the torches lit lighting the room magnificently. The room itself was about half the size of the library he exited

Harry was proved right. There were five rows of shelves in the middle. The ends of them were facing him. The shelves reached the ceiling and he guessed that they were 15 feet long. There were shelves covering most of the walls except for the areas where there was a door and the top 2 feet of the wall where there were tons of torches.

Harry walked to the door and opened it. He walked into a room painted gold with red trimming, and was about half the size of the hidden library. There were 3 square tables, each with 4 chairs around them, spread throughout the room. There was a small cart similar to the one he had seen madam Pince push around her library.

Harry turned and exited the room. He walked through the rows of books looking for the symbol translators. As he looked at the books one thing be came certain: all of the books in there were dark books.

"no wonder this place is hidden... bingo." he whispered to himself joyfully as he stared at a half of a bookcase that was filled with books on ancient and new styles of rune and symbol writing. Smirking he shrunk them and placed them in his trench coat pocket.

Happy with his jackpot, he went to the porthole which opened as if it had known he wanted to leave. He walked through and... Right into Ginny.

Harry jumped to the side with a growl and rapidly began to brush himself off.

"I'm not diseased you know!" Ginny said roughly. He turned to her.

"I know." he stated. And walked passed her to the upward, spiraling, metal, staircase.

"Hey, where are you going?" he heard Ginny call after him. He turned again but leaving his right foot on the bottom stair. He noticed that run and Hermione had walked over to the youngest Wesley with arms filled with books. He flicked his wrist and the books were all the size of matchboxes. They then put them in their pockets and whispered thanks. And it hit him right then how nervous he was making them. Yeah he did want them a little nervous but not as scared as they were.

"Well I'm going to go pack." he said trying to sound a little nice. At their nervous stares he sighed "I can give you a quick tour on the way to my room...?" he said uncertainly they nodded and began to follow.

"Ok on the fist floor right... Here" he said pausing on the first landing they came to. "Is the kitchen, dining room, game room, parlor, and living room... Oh yeah and a couple of bathrooms." he said continuing upwards to the second floor.

"How many floors are there?" asked Hermione.

"Err... I think three including the basement that we were just in. but I do believe that there is an attic. I haven't had time to check yet..."

"You had like over a month and a half and you don't have enough time to see if there's even an attic?" Ron accused angrily. Harry took a deep calming breath.

"No. I was busy training myself and cleaning this place up with just Mel to help. No offence to her but she isn't that good of a cleaner." He said surprising even himself with his calmness. "But I do think that there is one as the stairs continue up even though we are already at the 'bedroom' floor... It's a floor with only bedrooms and bathrooms." he explained. Walking into the off white hall way, the sounds of their shoes against the light wood floor bounced against the closed doors and walls.

"Err... bedroom ...Bedroom... Bedroom Bathroom... Aaahhh my room." he said pointing at the respective doors till he got to his own and opened the door. He heard them all gasp. And he chuckled as he entered and kicked open his trunk and lifted it onto the bed.

"Amazing isn't it?" he asked as he glanced at their stunned faces while stuffing all of his things into the trunk. They nodded in agreement.

"Did you paint this?" Hermione asked. He let out a laugh startling them.

"No... No I didn't my parents did. "He said and started to put his clothes neatly into the trunk. While he was packing by hand he never saw Ron wave his wand. But he did hear a whooshing sound and managed to turn around right in time to see are swords and knives flying at him blades first.

--------

Harry heard laughter. He smelled fancies and blood. Felt the cold stone on his back and heavy chains around his wrists and ankles cutting his skin and blocking off the circulation of blood. Knives and shards of glass were being thrown at him. He saw one go right through his hand and into the stone behind it. As others sank into his leg, waist and stomach. He cried out in agony but only got more laughter... laughter... they were laughing at his pain...

--------

Someone was screaming. As if they were dieing. He finally realized that it was him screaming. He closed his mouth and opened his eyes that he didn't even remember closing. Harry removed his hands from his face and went to stand up but someone grabbed his arm. He growled and they let go. He slowly stood and shook his head...shook out the memory.

"Harry, you ok?" he heard Mel ask. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before nodding. He turned to his packed trunk and began digging in it for a certain paper bag...

He found it near the bottom. Harry quickly opened it and pulled out a little bottle that sounded slightly like a rattle when shook he poured out two long oval pills and tossed them into his mouth and conjured a glass of water that he quickly took a gulp from. He took another sip to make sure that the pills made it to his stomach before putting the glass on the bedside table

"Who... did that?" he said slowly turning to the four others in the room. Ron shakily raised his hand. Harry curled the corner of his top lip. "There was a reason I didn't do that and that was because of the many sharp objects I have in my possession..." Harry told him.

"Harry what did you take?" Hermione asked worriedly. Harry thought for a minute...

"Err... not sure but I know that it calms someone down... see I haven't come up with a name for it..." He informed "It's a dehydrated calming draught that with water and a few seconds in the stomach turns back into its natural form."

Harry walked over to the bed stand and opened the drawers and began to grab all of the cd's and the large paper bag that was in there. He stuffed them into the trunk before he closed, locked, and shrunk it.

"Everyone ready?" he asked as placed the trunk in his pocket. Everyone murmured an affirmative.

"Oh wait, Harry, which boots?" Mel asked as she raised two pairs of high healed (black) boots. One pair was knee high the other only went up to the ankle.

He sighed with a grin and looked at her newly change out fit: she had a skin tight blood red long sleeve shirt that barely stayed on her shoulders but also had a black tank top underneath , black fingerless gloves, a tight, short, black jean cut off skirt , with black fishnets.

He shook his head in amusement as he saw that Ron was gawking at her.

"Knee high boots" he said she shrunk the others and put the knee high ones on before she finally put her trench coat on.

"Ok, Ginny can you apparate?" he asked the young red head. She shook her head 'no'. "Ron, or Hermione, could you take her?" he asked Hermione nodded and grabbed Ginny's wrist with a crack they were gone. Ron followed then Mel. Harry took one last look around before He too apparatus away.

Harry felt his feet implant themselves into soft ground and felt what he thought to be a bucket of icy water fall on his head. He looked up and saw that it was raining heavily changing the snow into a lot of slush.

Mel went to share her umbrella with him but he walked swiftly away, eyes studying the puddles on the ground. The way they rippled when he stepped into it distorting the world showed in its cold depths. Studied the sounds that the slush made under his feet. He turned to his fellow Gryffindor's.

"Come on" he said

"Harry where your glasses are?" he heard someone ask.

"In my trunk... I got contacts" he informed as he slid between the bars of the fence. He shed his coat, shrunk it, and placed it in his pants pocket. He heard many yelling in protest, but he ignored them. And welcomed the cold rain.

He ran forward and did a front Handspring. He let out a yell of cheer. He turned to the others who were staring at him as if he were crazy. Mel however was cracking up. Harry smirked and ran in a small circle before doing a series of cart wheels. Harry stopped and began running all the way up to the castle where he finally stopped. He stood in a large and deep puddle. Unfortunately the moon wasn't bright enough to show him that there was a sheet of ice under the water and he slipped and fell flat on his back in the ankle deep water.

Star appeared in front of his eyes and they weren't in the sky. He felt an enormous pain in the back of his head. He laid there in a daze for a few seconds till something occurred to he and he started cracking up in a fit of laughter.

He managed to flip himself over and to slowly standup even though he was still laughing with his hands on his knees. He heard worried shrieks. And looked up to see 3 pale and worried female faces all asking if he was all right. He looked to the right and saw that Ron was cracking up as well. He calmed him self down and turned to the worried females.

"I'm fine just a major headache..." he added feeling the back of his head. He felt something... weird. He brought the hand to the front of his face and saw in the moonlight a dark almost black substance was on his right hand. He lit his left and saw that there was blood on his hand. They all fell silent.

"Holy shit..." Harry whispered

"You need to get to the infirmary... NOW!" Hermione said loudly. Harry grabbed his head as the world began turning. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a shrunken cane.

"Engorgio..." he whispered the cane grew to its normal size. Harry immediately regretted doing it the headache he had before grew 10 times worse then it had been. He hissed in pain. And flinched as someone went to grab his elbow. He limped up the marble stairs. He saw someone rush forward to open the door. He limped passed them and into the lit entrance way

"Oh my god..." he heard a few of them whisper.

"portus." someone said "Harry touch this... now Harry or you won't make it." Harry touched the boot that was held in front of him he felt a familiar pull behind his navel and felt his feet slam into the stone floor. His legs crumpled beneath him and he toppled to the floor. He heard voices and saw feet... but they faded away and he was enveloped in black...

"I can not believe he did that!"

"That was so incredibly stupid!"

Harry felt sore all over. He heard familiar voices but couldn't remember what happened.

"Even after dieing 2 he still doesn't get it!"

"That's Harry for ya"

Harry chuckled and opened his eyes. But upon seeing the brightness he quickly closed them and pulled the blankets over his head.

"Bright lights! Bright lights!" He cried out. He heard people laughing. He slowly pulled the cover down from over him and opened his eyes. Everything was clear, but his eyes felt dry and uncomfortable.

"Mel, can you get my contact case, solution, and glasses out of my trunk?" he asked as he took the contacts out of his eyes. He blinked as his eyes started watering. He put the contacts into the awaiting gloved, palm in front of his face. He then grabbed His glasses from the other gloved, hand. He raised his head to put them on and groaned as the pain in the back of his head flared up.

"Serves you right! What did you think you were doing?" asked an irate Madam Pomfrey.

"Having fun." He said childishly crossing his arms and sticking his nose in the air in defiance but hissed in pain as his head throbbed again. Those around him chuckled. The nurse handed him a potion and he took it. Instantly the pain in his head was gone. And so was the care free sense that he had had. He looked around him. There was Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Mel, Lupin, Tonks, and McGonagall.

Harry ran a hand through his hair and went to sit up. Madam Pomfrey put a hand on his chest to push him back down. Harry growled and rolled off the bed. He landed in a crouching position. He stood up but apparently a little too fast as he was over come by dizziness.

"Harry get back in bed. You need your rest." exclaimed Mel. He shook his head 'no' and walked to the end of his bed and rummaged around in his trunk for his clothes and large paper bag. Once he found a pair of black baggy bondage pants he took off the sweat pants they had put him in along with the hospital gown.

"Oh my..." whispered Hermione. Harry turned, shirt and pants in hand, (he had his boxers on!) to the shocked people.

"What?" he asked curiously. Ginny managed to point at his showing flesh. He looked down and saw that the glamour was wearing off and they could see several stab wounds. The one he knew they were pointing at on his thigh read: SLUT.

"Fuck!" he whispered concentrating on covering the scars up. He felt the magic fall into place. He looked down and was happy that they were once again covered. He sighed and quickly pulled on his pants. He threw the black muscle t-shirt on the bed and dug in the trunk some more. The people around him began talking in worried voices.

Harry pulled out his boots two 'small' knives, socks, and his leather gloves. He pulled the socks on followed by the boots. Harry completely ignored the pity filled questions as he put a knife in each boot and pulled a glove on each hand. He shrunk his trunk and grabbed the t-shirt from the bed. And headed for the door.

"No Harry, you're not leaving." growled Lupin as he and some of the adults formed a wall in front of him. Harry quirked an eyebrow.

"We love you and you need rest." said Hermione

"We won't let you leave. We're not going to lose you..." Lupine began but Harry put up a hand to make him stop.

"You guys think I'm leaving the castle?" he asked in a monotone. They nodded. He chuckled. "Ha ha ha... But... No. I'm just leaving the hospital wing. I have certain... Business... here. Nope sorry but your stuck with me." he said with a chuckle.

"Mr. Potter... You are staying here I have to check your head make sure that your concussion healed properly." Madam Pomfrey said.

"Head is fine... Well as fine as it'll ever be mentally but you know..." he said. The nurse however didn't buy it. She pointed sternly at the bed and he went and sat telling himself that in order to get business done he had to at least attempt to get on their good side.

"Alright ... But no touching or I will get very angry." he light heartedly but he knew that they caught the murderous tone. She nodded and flicked her wand. "Can I go?" he asked a few minutes later as she began walking away. She nodded her reply.

"Harry do you realize that there is ink on you?" asked Ron

"Yeah I got some tattoos. Ain't they cool?" Harry asked sounding rather happy

"Err... why did you tattoo and pierce yourself Harry?" asked Hermione shakily. He just stared at her.

"I don't know actually." he said somewhat truthfully as he stood to exit. They stood with him. Ginny went around behind him. He felt her breath on his back

"Gin what the hell are you doing?" he asked walking away and turning back to her.

"I was trying to figure out what it said." she said

"It says: Paybacks A Bitch." he informed

"Harry James Potter you will watch your mouth!" snapped Professor McGonagall.

"Ok! Jeeze no reason to yell!" He said as he lifted his arms in defeat. He figured the professor would have bought it had he been able to keep the smirk off his face.

"Ok Mr. Potter now you and Miss Deid will be able, with supervision of course, to go to Diagon Alley in order to purchase your school supplies." McGonagall said more seriously. "So do you have anyone in mind?" she asked.

"Hmmm... How 'bout good ol' Moony and I dunno. You pick Mel." Harry said blankly. Mel began to bite her lip as she cocked her head to the side. "There are only 2 bloody choices that you know of for fucks sake!" He said angrily Mel chuckled and pointed to Tonks.

"How 'bout her? She seems pretty ok with looking ... different." she whispered questioningly to Harry.

"Took you long enough" Harry growled back. Mel just smirked. "Can I go now? We have everything done and I want a shower." he said to everyone.

"Ok. Breakfast is in an hour. Have a good day" said the Headmistress before she exited.

Harry locked and shrunk his trunk before he placed it in his pocket. He grabbed his shirt and went towards the door he heard the others following him.

They walked in silence down corridor after corridor stair after stair. Harry pulled his shirt on as they went.

"See you at breakfast." Tonks called out as she and Lupin took a right turn and the rest of them continued up the stairs till they finally made it to the fat lady's portrait. Hermione said the password and they entered.

"C'mon Mel, the dorms are this way..." Hermione said. Mel walked over to her and they went towards the girls' staircase with Ginny following behind. Ron motioned for Harry to follow him.

"Wait a second Hermione, Ginny, Mel (if you want) could you come back for a sec?" Harry asked. The girls paused but did return to where Harry was standing.

"What is it?" Ginny asked.

"Well... I know that you weren't expecting me to turn up like this." He said gesturing with his hands at his clothes and piercing's.

"We weren't expecting you at all." stated Ron with a chuckle.

"Anyways... I just wanted to tell you I'm sorry and that I'll try to be more like the 'other Harry' after the war... Well if I live." He added but he sensed that he sounded a little too hopeful… They nodded in agreement

"Why can't you try now?" asked Ginny.

"Well I have certain things making that near impossible at the moment." he said carefully. He didn't want anyone knowing his entire plans. Not even Mel knew all of them and she had been living in the same house with him for almost two months.

Ginny nodded her reply and the girls and boys went to their respective staircases and then dorms. And Harry was finally able to take his shower.


	13. Reviving Friendships

Disclaimer: I do NOT own any of the HP character or other things you recognize from the books.

CHAPTER 13

**Reviving Friendships**

Harry stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist. He grabbed another towel and used it to quickly dry most of his hair before he pulled on his boxers and left the bathroom.

The dormitory was empty. And he went over to his trunk that he had already enlarged, and began to dig around. He pulled out a black wife beater, a black button-up silk dress shirt, a pair of black cargo pants, and a pair of socks, his gloves, and boots.

He quickly pulled the rest of his clothes on and grabbed his trench coat, wand, and money bag before he exited the dormitory and bounded down the stairs.

The common room he saw was all but empty. Mel laid stretched out on the couch reading. He slowly made his way to her.

"Hey where is everyone?" He asked once he had reached her. She placed her bookmark into the book and closed it.

"Enshronkio..." she whispered and the book shrunk and she put into her pocket."They went to breakfast15 minutes or so ago I stayed to allow the other girls talk about how weird I am." she stated standing up and he saw what she was wearing.

"What the hell are you wearing" he asked.

Mel was wearing her usual make-up, a short plaid skirt that showed the straps that held up her fishnet stockings, a skin tight white blouse that was a quarter of the way unbuttoned as well as a pair of black high heals that looked quite similar to the shoes that Hogwarts girls wore except that they added nearly 4inches to her height and looked as though they belonged to a hooker. To top it off she put her hair up in pig-tales.

"School girl outfit." she said innocently.

"Ok but you need to at least put a tank top underneath ok?"

Mel sighed and flicked her wand; a black tank top appeared underneath. It successfully covered most of her breasts. Harry smiled and she rolled her eyes.

"Happy?" She asked as if she were offended or angry. He nodded. And she smiled shaking her head and raking a hand through her black and red hair. He noticed that her gloves matched her skirt.

"What happened? You look like a drowned rat seriously you should at least try to do something with your hair." she scolded. He smirked and shook his head like a dog after it get out of the shower. Little water droplets flew every where. Mel glared darkly at him as she cast a drying spell on herself.

"Well? Now it's spiked." he said with a smirk. She rolled her violent purple eyes.

Together they walked to and through the porthole, shrunk their coats and put them in their pockets.

Mel was amazed at how big and beautiful the castle was. Harry grimaced as he remembered running through the halls with Ron and Hermione.

It wasn't long till they were at the great hall and Harry realized that there were butterflies in his stomach. He ignored them. Harry reached out and grasped the door handle and pulled it open.

The chatter and noise died down as Harry and Mel entered. Harry took a deep breath and quickened his pace towards Gryffindor table. He saw that Ron Hermione and Ginny had saved Him and Mel a seat. Harry felt the entire halls eyes on him as he sat down next to Ginny. Mel took the seat next to him, across from Hermione who was next to Ron. Harry looked around the hall. The Slytherins were glaring at him and he smirked as new plans entered his mind.

"Harry is something wrong?" Ginny asked tentavilly. He turned to her. "It's just that you look a little ... Well scary."

"Oh I'm sorry didn't want to make you uncomfortable." He said quickly. And indeed he did actually mean it. "Look I realize you're a little uncomfortable. But can we move past that and all be friends again? I mean I am definitely going to need your help with... things." He said lowering his voice. They nodded quietly. Mel was looking at them all with amusement in her eyes.

"Yeah your right Harry it's just that it was a huge shock. You may not know but you've already had two burial ceremonies." Hermione informed him. Harry's eyes widened and a smirk formed on his face.

"Wow! I knew I was buried at Godrics Hollow but where else?"

"Here you dumbass and you do know cause I told you when you came back!" Mel said heatedly. Harry thought for a minute.

"Oh yeah after I told you to fuck off." he paused as he laughed those around him backed away.

"Ha ha... actually several times not just once you were a right basterd when you woke up." she said laughing herself. The other three stared confusedly at them.

"Err... Harry are you two together?" asked Ron nervously. Mel began to laugh even harder as did Harry.

"Me...Her? Ha ha ha...aaaaahhh...no." he said as he stopped laughing as did Mel.

"Now that would be some fuc... Messed up relationship." She said. Harry nodded in agreement.

"Yeah especially since neither of us like human contact... That'd be pretty freakin hilarious!" He exclaimed "anyways have you two hooked up yet?" He asked pointing at Ron and Hermione and raising an eyebrow. Said people cheeks reddened before shaking their heads 'no'. Harry let out a laugh and began to pile food up on his plate.

The two red heads and the brunette began filling Harry and Mel in on all of the things that went on in Hogwarts when he was gone. Harry felt almost completely relaxed during the conversation. But then again he didn't allow himself to be entirely relaxed because that was when things mistakes were made.

"Despite everything this place still looks the same..." He murmured to himself.

"Yeah... But it doesn't feel the same. Not without Dumbledore." Ginny said as she had obviously heard him.

Harry's fists clenched. Hermione noticed and told him comfortingly-

"Harry It wasn't your fault he died. That blame goes on Snape..." she never got the chance to finish her statement as Harry's anger got the best of him.

"DON'T EVER... ever say that name around me, again." He said lowering his voice dangerously as the first words had brought a lot of stares their way. Hermione looked into her friend's eyes and saw a murderous spark in them that scared her deeply.

"Harry ... What did he do to you?" she asked looking him strait in the eye.

Harry broke the eye contact and looked at his hands that were literally smoking through his gloves.

A dark smirk crossed his face as he said. "I don't remember." and laughed at their reaction. The stunned looks on their faces were priceless. "Actually I don't know... I just know that he's going to regret it..." His face was blank of all emotion as he said that in a monotone. He started chuckling again to himself as he turned towards his plate and dug into the scrambled eggs.

"Ok Harry I think there's a reason I didn't feed you till 10." Mel said taking his plate from him as he shrugged.

"You fed him as well?" Ginny asked. Mel nodded.

"Yup I was basically his maid. But he taught me a lot in return so I guess it's a pretty close trade."

"Yeah I mean she did help me figure out how to heal most of my injuries..." Harry started.

"What do you mean most?" asked Ron. "You seem perfectly healthy other than how pale you are and the scar we saw earlier... You didn't do that to yourself did you?"

"No... I don't cut myself... on purpose anyways. And what I mean by most is that some injuries just aren't reparable even with magic... Mostly due to the fact they were caused with magic. Not to mention that they were healed terribly and then ruined again." He said rather quickly and calmly even though inside he was shifting un comfortably.

Harry looked around and saw that people were leaving for the Hogsmeade weekend. He pulled out his 'mini' trench coat and whispered "engorgio" as he waved a hand over it. The coat returned to its normal size and Harry stood and pulled it on.

"Ready to go Mel?" Harry asked as he played with the collar. She nodded as she flung her enlarged coat over her shoulders and began buttoning the buttons from the waist up. The Chinese styled, shiny black coat clung to her body.

"Ready." she said. Harry nodded and they walked up to the staff table where Lupin and Tonks were talking quietly with each other.

"Moony!" Harry said rather loudly with a smile spread across his face as he looked at his last link to his parents and godfather. His cold hard eyes softened as he saw the weariness in the werewolf's eyes. There were lines around Lupins eyes. As well as red lines in the whites of his eyes.

Guilt pain and sorrow that he had willed away so long ago filled his very being as he realized what horrors the weary man before him had been through. As he realized that it was his entire fault. Anger flared in him, not directed at anyone but himself. Silently he vowed that he would make everything right... one way or another.

"Well are you ready to go?" Tonks asked politely. He saw the two adults before him rise and walk to join Mel and himself. Harry shook his head and stared at the ceiling where you could see the sun fighting the clouds to be seen. He looked down at his pocket and reached his hand in for his small note pad. He ripped out a piece of parchment and muttered "portus" before he tore it into 4 pieces and handed them out to the two adults and Mel saving one for himself. A pull behind the navel later and they landed in a corner of the leaky cauldron.

"You know Harry that's illegal." Tonks said. Harry nodded thoughtfully

"Yeah... but I didn't feel like walking to Hogsmeade just to apparate away. And floo would have gotten my clothes dirty." Harry whined. Lupin chuckled softly at the agitated look Tonks gave Harry.

"Harry your clothes are black! The soot wouldn't show!" she said before laughing because Harry smiled sweetly at her.

"Yeah can we get some drinks first before shopping?" Mel asked. Harry flicked his wrist and reached into his pocket pulling out a bottle of Fire whiskey. He took a long draw from it before he handed it to Mel.

"Harry where'd you get that?" Lupin asked cautiously

"I just conjured it." Harry said moving towards the back door that would bring them to the brick wall that hid Diagon Alley Once they reached the brick wall Harry stopped and turned to the adults.

"You guys need to calm down and relax... I'm still Harry. Ok? I'm not gonna kill you or hurt you." Harry said

"We never thought you would..."

"So why are you so uptight?" He asked accusingly. "I'm sill the Potters' boy. And I'm still Sirius' godson... And you are still Moony. One of the three great marauders..." He sighed as he tapped the bricks with his wand.

"Harry there were four Marauder's..." Lupin started.

"The rat don't count." Harry said sternly they laughed and walked inside to shop...

------A few minutes later-------

"Can we PLEASE go where we want to go?" Mel practically begged the adults before her

"You aren't going to go get more tattoos or piercing's!" Lupin stated sternly.

"Look we're going and there's nothing you can do to stop us... Now you can come and make sure all goes well or we can go alone... Your choice." Harry said with a grin as they asked for the coordinates.

"Ok... Mel why don't you go buy what ever you wanted in Hot Topic while I go get my tattoo as it'll take longer than your piercing." Harry said they nodded and left to the different stores. Mel went with Tonks while Lupin went with Harry.

Harry walked into the tattoo parlor and handed the heavily tattooed man a drawing.

"Can you do it?" Harry asked. The man nodded.

"Where do you want it?" he asked

"Back"

"Kay, lay down on that table and I'll be with you in a second." Harry nodded and obeyed. The man returned and Harry heard the needle turn on and felt it as it set to work.

"How does he needle know what to do?" Lupin asked

"Well, the guy puts the drawing into it and tells it the size and what not that it should be. And the needle goes to work..." He said some what enjoying the pain from the needle.

"Harry How's it goin'?" He heard Mel ask.

"Pretty good I think. How's it look?" Harry asked her.

"Wow! It looks great!" she exclaimed excitedly. "Hey sir can I get a belly piercing..." Mel asked as she walked farther away from Harry towards another guy behind the counter...

-----------

"I can't believe that you thought of then drew that! What is it anyway?" Tonks asked as Harry's back was being wiped off by a wet rag.

"It's a Phoenix in a fire-lily. Or in other words lily on fire." Harry said. As he stood up and walked in front of the tall mirror. Mel held up another mirror so that he could see the tattoo. It was just like his drawing. The flames were Green and black along with the lily. Although he did notice that the phoenix was not present. The tattoo covered most of his back and didn't touch the words above it.

The guy Harry talked to earlier flicked his wand and a large bandage attached itself to his back covering the tattoo.

"Now keep that on for 24 hours as it has a water repellent charm on it to keep it safe. And come back this time in two weeks and I'll put the phoenix in. right now there would be a good chance of the needle messing up or piercing the skin." The tatooer said before Harry left after paying him. The four of them apparated back to a drenched Diagon Alley and attacked the stores for school supplies.

Unfortunately there was another attack but of a different sort that would cost many their lives... and some their very sanity.


	14. BANG!: ReDone

Disclaimer: I still don't own anything but my character thank u :-)

Author notes: I have re done chapters 14 through ... well till the end so yea deffinetly need to re read cuz they r a tad different i just didnt like where it was goin so had to alter lol well thank you for all your support and hope u like the newer version keep R&R-ing

CHAPTER 14

**BANG!**

A frightened scream pierced through the rain soaked buildings of Diagon Alley and into Harry Potter's ear. Harry quickly stuffed the last of his shrunken books and supplies into his pocket before taking long strides to the door of the shop. He pushed it open and as if on cue more fearful screams erupted throughout the Alley and the rain fell harder. He saw people running every which was trying to grab their children and others so as to save them from a terrible fate.

Harry turned back towards his 'guards' before he said...

"My lucky day!" in a low growl as a smirk played across his face, his eyes got a murderous glint and is hands started smoking.

"No, Harry... no killing, just stun them and bind them. Ok? We need them to figure out where the layer is." Lupin said with a playful smirk… but sternly just the same. Harry let out a childish whine. Lupin stood his ground. And Harry gave up.

"Fine... But yeh know what? I will get my way... eventually." Harry said stubbornly as he pulled out his wand and walked out into the pouring rain that almost immediately soaked him to the bone. The other three followed suit behind him.

Harry looked at the mayhem before him and was stunned (not with a spell). There were people running everywhere as if they were chickens with their heads cut off. But he did see that there were adults fighting back against what he guessed to be fifty Death Eaters, while others grabbed children and put them in nearby stores. For that Harry was thankful. But despite the efforts and the earliness into the battle there were still bodies littering the ground most he saw were civilians.

Laughter reached Harry's ears. He turned to the right and saw a Death Eater standing over a young girl, about 6 years old with long brown hair, laughing as she kneeled over her mother's dead frame sobbing and begging her to wake up. The servant grabbed her arm and smacked her across the face…

"You guys go left I'll take the right" He told the other three. They argued for several seconds before they gave into Harry's orders and went left.

Harry ran towards the young girl while he threw stunners at a few Death Eaters on the way once he got a few feet away from her he yelled the first thing that came to mind "STUPEFY" The Death Eater turned to him and got the stunner strait in the chest. The Death Eater fell to the ground unconscious. Harry felt exhilarated, as if he could do anything. He felt as if he was nearing a high for the first time... and he loved it.

"Come here sweetie." Harry said kindly to the little girl. She wrenched her arm away from the unconscious man beside her and quickly made her way to Harry.

"Sweetie, this is a bad place to be. Go in this store right here... " He said pointing to the store with a lot of other little kids in it. She nodded. And Harry couldn't tell if it was tears falling from her eyes or just rain as she ran into the store.

Harry turned away and saw a large group of death eaters around several people. Harry got an idea and conjured two katana swords and two knives that he put inside his boots. Before he apparated to the center of the circle, where he heard familiar scream, one that he had heard several times in the middle of the night...

"Hello!" Harry said brightly before he cut off one of the Death Eaters wand arms. He screamed in pain and fell to the ground cradling his stump of an arm. Blood gushed out of the remaining limb, and Harry got a faceful. He licked his upper lip and smirked. Harry could feel the adrenaline pick up the pace at the mere taste of the blood. He wanted more, so much more……

All at once the rest of the Death Eaters yelled out a mixture of unforgivables. Harry ducked into a squatting position and swiped his swords around successfully cutting off several legs. Blood went everywhere. Harry stood looking at the fallen half of the circle and quickly sent each of them a stunner. Unfortunately the others had decided to through several cutting hexes at him. He felt them rip through his clothes and into his flesh. He turned to the other half that was about to send of some more spells.

He kicked one in the chest so hard that it sent him flying backwards several feet until his head met the brick wall. Harry dropped the swords and lit his hands and formed a ball of fire in his right palm and started tossing it lightly up in the air like a baseball before he snapped his fiery fingers and the ball lengthened and wrapped around the five still conscious Death Eaters like a rope.. A smirk appeared on his face and a murderous glint in his eye. He looked down to see if there was anything he could do to help whoever they had been hurting and gasped. Breath ran out of him like the rain from the clouds.

Mel lay sprawled on the ground before him in a puddle, blood flowing from several cuts on her face and body. He pushed away the fact that blood as swirling with the rain water. Harry let out a growl and kneeled down, Mel lay there unconcious

"NO... Mel... Mel wake up p... p... please wake up" Harry begged shaking her body. Harry's eyes flashed and an animalistic growl erupted from his chest. He didn't hear any of the battle going on around him didn't hear the raindrops hitting the deep puddles. Didn't feel the rain soak through his clothes and flatten his hair. Or even the blood soaking deeper into his clothes and covering his face from the soaked hair of his fallen friend, nor his teeth piercing another hole in his lip. It took several of the longest minutes of his life before he came mostly back to reality. He stood and walked over to the Death Eaters he had tied up.

He yanked off their masks wanting to know who they were. However he only recognized two of the five by name... Avery and Nott. Images flashed through his mind as he looked at their faces and he froze in shock and fear. His heart hammered in his chest and he growled forcing down the images.

The flames containing the death eaters grew bigger and hotter the men within them began to yell out in pain bringing harry from his mind. He looked up from under his bangs his eyes completely black he smirked a smirk that chilled them to the bones.

"Who the fuck are you?" demanded Avery. The dark smirk grew on Harry's face and he cocked his head to the side. The five before him were scared shitless at the insane murderous glint in his black eyes. He reached his hand up and pushed his hair back from his face to reveal the lightning bolt scar. They gasped and Harry smiled wider.

"Your worst fucking nightmare" he said in a dangerously low voice. He dropped his hand from his head and with it went the smile.

"You!" Knott said shocked "Your just a worthless halfblood…"

Anger flared through Harry stronger than ever at the audacity after all they had done to him and now mel…. Fire spread from his hands to the rest of his body, and abruptly the five of them burst into flame. The fire turned black and then there was a loud bang. The Death Eaters blew up. Bits of their flaming bodies flew into the air. Harry was immediately covered in blood. Steaming bits of flesh and bone floated to the ground.

The fire covering him went out but his arms stayed lit.

Harry turned to the fight that was still going on and formed several fireballs and threw them at each of the remaining Death Eaters (about 15) He put a permanent burning charm on it so it wouldn't go out or kill the person. Just cause them a lot pain. Harry then flicked his wrist and they all were stuck together in the center of the Alley screaming as if the were slowly being burned alive.

Harry walked over to the limp form of Melina Deid and kneeled once again he stoked her hair and stared at her beautiful face in fascination. She still had her coat on and she had lost a shoe. Harry pulled the fire in so as to not hurt her anymore as he didn't have complete confidence that it would do as he asked completely yet. He tried to remember the spells to heal her but all he knew he could do without risk was the small cuts and bruises as he was afraid he would do it wrong and make things worse.

Harry heard feet pounding the pavement and splashing in the puddles as they hurried towards him.

"Harry? Oh god... What happened?" Harry heard Lupin ask after he had obviously seen Mel. Harry didn't answer him. He just couldn't bring himself to say it cause then it would be true...

"Harry... I'll get you and mel a port key to get you back to the Hogwarts infirmery before the minister gets here. Ok?" Lupin asked softly 'as though any harsh word would break me' Harry thought angrily but pushed it away.

the werewolf grabbed a rock from the ground and muttered portus and with a sad smile "Itll be ok" he said though inside his heart was breaking at how empty and dull the green eyes were. He didn't know how they could have ever of belonged to the mischievous and happy boy he had once been... Lupin quickly shoved those thoughts aside and turned to Harry. Who was still watching him as if studying him. He handed him the port key and the 2 teens were gone

just as the minister and aurors arrived.

---------------------------

Harry landed roughly on his knees and Mel's cold hand in his. He heard a gasp and turned to the school nurse. Pomfrey was pale in the face and had a hand over her mouth so as to not scream.

"Madam Pomfrey I...I need you to help her." was all Harry could think of to say. She nodded.

"Get her on a bed and I'll get started." she said gesturing to the closest bed. Harry obliged, and quickly lifted Mel's body into his arms cradling her like she was a baby. He placed her softly onto the bed. Madam Pomfrey asked him to go and take a shower but he only growled. And she whipped the curtains closed.

Harry sat there several minutes staring at his blood covered hands but not truly seeing them at all, as His mind was yelling at him for putting her in danger...

He was told to go behind the curtains. Harry took a deep breath before walking to the curtains and pulling them to the side. The sight he saw made him freeze in his tracks.

Mel lay in the bed the covers going to her neck her clothes thrown on the floor out of the way. Her face was paler than he had ever seen her. There was no make-up on her face. Despite the fact that they had lived in the same house for so long Harry had never seen her with out makeup on and he felt that she looked like an angel.

"Harry... I did all I could" pomfrey started

Harry's heart seemed to freeze at the sight of her laying there pale beat up. His breathing became ragged. "Ex... ex... excuse me..." he said as he stumbled from the room and into the hall.

He was shaking like crazy and he felt as though there was no air around him. He ran though hall after hall, down to the main floor and out the door in a daze. It felt as though time had stopped, as though if he kept running eventually everything would go back to the way it was.

He ran through the large gates and into Hogsmeade. Harry just kept running. He stepped on a piece of ice and fell his hands prevented his face from hitting the ground. He let his face touch the ground and slammed his fist into the ice shattering it into a bunch of tiny shards. Several of which got stuck in his hand despite the leather glove that covered it. Harry slowly raised his sore body and looked where he was. Right in front of the Three Broomsticks.

Harry walked inside and over to the bar. He sat on one of the barstools and waved for Madam Rosmerta to walk over. He ordered several bottles of her strongest firewhiskey. She didn't even ask for an id. 'Apparently seeing someone covered in blood scares her' he thought. She quickly obliged and handed him the booze. Harry six of them in his expandable pocket and opened the seventh then exited the bar as it was filled with hogwarts students.

He noticed faintly that it was barely sprinkling as he walked down the street. Students and adults alike stared and whispered as he walked by. Harry knew it. But as he had done since he started school he ignored them and opened then poured some of the steaming liquid down his throat.

His shock was gone but was quickly replaced with a fiery anger that brought tears to his eyes and fire to his hands. He let out a growl and slammed his fist into the brick wall of a little shop.

Harry looked at the large dent he had created for a second before he felt a stab of pain travel from his fist up to his neck. He hissed in pain as he brought his fist back and did it again and successfully broke through the brick wall. Though his fist had begun bleeding profusely as bits of brick had gotten stuck in his skin through his now tattered leather gloves. The gloves mel had given to him…

He ignored it and half walked half ran up the street. He let his feet carry him as he greedily finished off the first bottle and pulled out a second.

Before he knew it he was sprawled on damp grass. His vision was blurry and not because of the alcohol or his blood and rain streaked glasses.

Pain filled him to the breaking point, as he realized he had just lost the only one who truly understood... and that it was his fault.

'Its my fault. if hadnt hadn't been for me she'd of been safe' he thought to himself finishing off another bottle. 'Go left I said go left and I'll go right... I make everyone around me get hurt… im cursed… I shouldn't be here anymore… they'd all be better off…' a growl of sorrow escaped his throat.

'I can't win! I get ahead and something gets else stolen from me or badly hurt…' he thought angrily.

"I can't fucking take this anymore!" He yelled as he sat up and dug in his damp coat pocket for something not even Mel had known that he had bought.

He pulled out a black 45 that he knew held one bullet. He couldn't really remember when he had gotten it, only that he was extremely depressed that day. But then Mel had comforted him by telling him how much she really cared.

"Mom you never should have given me your love, or have let me have my life..." Harry said quietly "It was a waste, just a waste of time of breath... that's all I am."

Tears prickled at the back of his empty emerald orbs, as he put the tip of the gun to the side of his head. He pressed his right pointer finger against the trigger and stared unseeingly out into the lake that had seen so much of his life and was now going to see the end of it.

What He saw was a semi happy face of the one he viewed as a real sister. The one he knew he'd never speak to again...

Harry blinked and a single tear formed in his eye. He faintly heard the horrified screams of 'NO'. Barley noticed the thundering footsteps coming towards him and the fact that the rain was pouring harder then he had ever felt before as if it too was trying to stop him.

He squeezed the trigger harder… a single tear slipped down his blood stained face… harder... and...

**BANG!**


	15. No Choice: ReDone

Disclaimer: Still dont own please don't sue! (brain cramp cant remember the right way to spell it lol)

Author notes: I have re done chapters 14 through ... well till the end so yea deffinetly need to re read cuz they r a tad different i just didnt like where it was goin so had to alter lol well thank you for all your support and hope u like the newer version keep R&R-ing

Chapter 15

**No Choice**

Flames erupted around him; breaking through the impending darkness.

"Hello Harry. We meet again. But sadly you won't be staying that long." said a deep voice. Harry fought to see through the flames but all he could see of the being before him was red skin and black clothing of some sort. The large figure flicked its' wrist and the flames lowered and seeped into the dark ground.

The ... creature? Maybe he wasn't sure but it had deep red skin and a rather muscular looking human body (from what he could see from his sitting position), but there were two horns coming out of its head. Its eyes were pitch black there weren't even the whites that form around the iris. The creature did indeed have black clothing on; a black trench coat, black slacks, and boots. It had black hair that was an inch long and spiked all over.

"What are you and where am I?" Harry demanded.

"Some call me 'Lucifer', some 'The Evil One' or 'Diablo' in Spanish. Most commonly though I am called the Devil." the red man said calmly. Harry understood and nodded.

"So this is hell?" he asked. Lucifer nodded. Harry gave him a questioning gaze. Lucifer merely returned it.

"What?"

"So when's the pain gonna start? The everlasting torture?" Harry exclaimed due to the fact that he wanted to feel the pain just so he could get over his internal pain.

The devil sighed before saying. "As I already told you. You're not staying for eternity. Just like you didn't the last time or the time before that."

"Hold on I only died one other time before now."

"Err... Nuh. You died for.… ten minutes after arriving at St. Mungo's. No one really noticed." He said checking a piece of paper. "How else did you think you got your new power over fire?" Harry shrugged. Lucifer rolled his eyes.

"People these days... Don't appreciate anything. You did... At first... Which brings us to the issue at hand."

"I don't want to go back! I won't!" Harry said stubbornly "I'm a bad person I got so many people killed ... And I killed people. I don't deserve to live!" Harry said desperately. Lucifer stood from his throne. And walked over to Harry. Lucifer was several inches over Harry who's head barely his chin.

He cupped the side of Harry's face in his clawed hand, and rubbed it with his thumb. Harry flinched at the contact and tried to get away but Lucifer cupped the other side of his face as well and forced Harry's fearful emerald eyes to look into the devils black ones.

"So much torture, so much pain, so much fear. Just because of a single touch..." Lucifer whispered as he dropped his hands and walked past Harry. "It takes a lot of brutality to get to that point... or something very traumatizing that one has a long period of time to brood over... sadly it was the latter for you..."

"Stop It!" Harry yelled. His hands gripping his hair tightly and his eyes clenched shut. Picture and memories were moving into Harry's view before his eyes.

"You need to accept and remember what happened. If you don't you'll never be able to control the fire." Lucifer stated sternly.

"I don't want to control it! I don't want to FUCKING REMEMBER!" Harry roared angrily as he slumpt to the floor. Flames enveloped his body and Harry let out a growl.

"See. You can't escape it even in death, especially here as you seem to like physical pain." Lucifer said with a smirk that showed his sharp teeth. Harry looked up at the demon with fearful eyes at the prospect.

"But sadly I am not allowed to keep you. As 'HE' said that if you chose to stay dead that you were to go to heaven... But in the mean time you get to watch some movies that could very well become the future of the world depending on your choices..." Lucifer said flicking his wrist.

Instantly pictures of a small cell that seemed only too familiar came into view within his mind. Harry recognized himself sitting in the far corner rocking back and forth. He barely heard himself whispering to himself.

Figures he recognized as death eaters entered and formed a half circle around 'Harry'

Harry heard his screams echo throughout the cell and into the depths of hell where he sat.

"Stop..."He said barely above a whisper to the devil. "Stop! STOP IT!" Harry yelled. He couldn't take it.

"Ok. I get it. I have to kill Voldemort but also get rid of at least most of his servants." Harry exclaimed angrily. Lucifer clapped his hands mockingly.

"That doesn't mean that I'm going back!" Harry said stubbornly. Lucifer rolled his eyes.

"Remember what happened to you? Huh? Well all your friends, your loved ones along with the rest of the world that opposed Voldemort will be enslaved, tortured and raped. Especially those were closest to you." Lucifer growled. "Would you like to see the video of it?" Harry was stunned by the mere thought of it. He shook his head 'no' before saying.

"I have to go back. I got no other choice…" he said barely above a whisper. Lucifer walked over to stand in front of Harry. Harry looked up at him with sadness filled eyes.

"One more thing..." Lucifer said as he put his forefingers on either side of Harry's head and pushed his long nails into Harry's temples causing blood to seep from the deep wounds and down his pale face. Just as flames rose from the ground and enveloped Harry within them.

Harry screamed out in horror and agony as he was forced to relive... to experience all he had worked so hard to block out. He felt all the pain, heard all their taunts, tasted all the tears and blood, saw all their smirks, and heard their laughter.

All the while Lucifer hissed in his ear. "It is time Harry... Time to make them pay, for all they did, for all they will have done. Let these memories be your fuel. Let these renewed scars fill your anger... after all it is because of Voldemort that any of this ever happened."

Harry heard sobs of several people. And for a second he thought he was fine, but then he was overcome by pain. Pain like he had never felt before. Not just physical or emotional, But his head felt as though it was literally breaking into several nasty pieces.

Harry began to yell and scream as though he dieing. He clutched desperately at his head but he only made the pain double. Which caused him to yell even louder.

The smell of burned grass filled the air as Harry's entire body was encased with green flames that appeared to be opaque despite their deep color.

After what felt like forever Harry felt the pain subside to a dull ache. His body he realized was in terrible pain.

He opened his green eyes and saw fuzzy figures surrounding him. The last thing he heard before he lost consciousness was...

"Go to sleep Harry, don't waste your energy. It's all gonna be ok."


End file.
